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However, it made me realize just how little I knew. It was a paradox. You reach a point of learning that exposes questions that you never knew existed, so it causes even more questions. Beware of folks who "have all the answers."
That was an awesome post and I loved every bit of it. All of it, seriously. Great stuff. But I had to comment on the section above. I hit that point and struggled for a while with what to do and how to "proceed" for lack of a better term. I even considered going back to college and taking seminary courses. Even to the point I was looking into my employer paying for college classes. And that was with ZERO intent on taking a job in the ministry. Not that I would have turned one down if it presented itself...I'm sure I would have taken that as a sign. Just I wasn't looking to change careers by a long shot.
I can't say that I had a sudden great epiphany, but it was more of a constant recurring thought. "His grace is sufficient for you." Every time I reached some hurdle or outright road block, it kept coming back. It took a long time for it to sink in. I'd almost worked my way into some mental learning legalism I can't explain, but it sounds like what you are describing. I guess what I'm saying is I no longer felt the need to "know all the answers". We can no more learn all the answers than we could live a sinless life. Only God has all the answers. Another reason we are supposed to trust and have faith. It was hard for me to take myself out of the decision making process for my spiritual journey. As everyone likes to say, "all of us make up the body of Christ." But some of us are definitely just toes...and I'm ok with that.