Letting Go🤔

[ldog]

Fuck it, if I get in trouble, so be it!!! It's not like you'd recognize my face now anyway but this was me until 2017. I'll try to remember to take it down tomorrow and anybody else is welcome to if they get to it first

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I’m proud of you dude. I don’t have the authority and option to remove the pics.

 

[ldog]

Well, I can honestly say that I have never had an addict in my life. Maybe a sex addict lol. But not one single person with a substance addiction. At least not that I am aware of. And to me that indicates it was never a problem.

I have however been on the other side of this like Sam. I was a major substance abuser. Alcohol probably cost me my marriage although she tried to come back twice lol. And an opioid addiction cost me the love of my life but we weren’t married. Alcohol cost me a career too.

I wasn’t your typical addict though. I never needed help with anything. Highly functioning I guess. But I never asked for money, rides, support, nothing. In fact my abuse made me a recluse that didn’t want or need other humans. In reality I needed community but I sure as hell didn’t want it. So the only way I was ever cut off in any relationship due to my substance use was 3 romantic relationships. I ended 1. One other tried to give me more chances but I declined. And the 3rd…. well it’s only been 8 months and I’m sober now. So I expect her to try and reconnect before too long lol. High quality gal too.

Good thread though. Addiction is hideous up close. I do now believe that it’s a disease. Treatable but likely always lingering in the background just waiting to be activated so it can take over again. Sorry to hear you are having to make tough choices, Ldog. I’m sure it’s exhausting. But just know we do recover. I hope your addicted loved ones get the help they need before it’s too late. I had to hit rock bottom to change. I literally lost everything except my finances. But absolutely everything else completely crashed. I’m still physically, mentally and emotionally recovering from my addiction. But I have zero desire to ever return to substance abuse. And perhaps it’s the first time in my life I could honestly say that.

Thanks for the kind words. I applaud you for speaking up. It’s takes a strong person to admit failure.

 

[ldog]

Well, I can honestly say that I have never had an addict in my life. Maybe a sex addict lol. But not one single person with a substance addiction. At least not that I am aware of. And to me that indicates it was never a problem.

I have however been on the other side of this like Sam. I was a major substance abuser. Alcohol probably cost me my marriage although she tried to come back twice lol. And an opioid addiction cost me the love of my life but we weren’t married. Alcohol cost me a career too.

I wasn’t your typical addict though. I never needed help with anything. Highly functioning I guess. But I never asked for money, rides, support, nothing. In fact my abuse made me a recluse that didn’t want or need other humans. In reality I needed community but I sure as hell didn’t want it. So the only way I was ever cut off in any relationship due to my substance use was 3 romantic relationships. I ended 1. One other tried to give me more chances but I declined. And the 3rd…. well it’s only been 8 months and I’m sober now. So I expect her to try and reconnect before too long lol. High quality gal too.

Good thread though. Addiction is hideous up close. I do now believe that it’s a disease. Treatable but likely always lingering in the background just waiting to be activated so it can take over again. Sorry to hear you are having to make tough choices, Ldog. I’m sure it’s exhausting. But just know we do recover. I hope your addicted loved ones get the help they need before it’s too late. I had to hit rock bottom to change. I literally lost everything except my finances. But absolutely everything else completely crashed. I’m still physically, mentally and emotionally recovering from my addiction. But I have zero desire to ever return to substance abuse. And perhaps it’s the first time in my life I could honestly say that.

Thanks for giving your story. I’m glad you’re here.

 

[chadmack]

Fuck it, if I get in trouble, so be it!!! It's not like you'd recognize my face now anyway but this was me until 2017. I'll try to remember to take it down tomorrow and anybody else is welcome to if they get to it first

Sent from my motorola razr 2025 using Tapatalk

I remember when u 1st showed up BOP, come a long way.
U & i traveled a very similar path

 

[ldog]

Good stuff from everyone on this thread. P.S.L. is a big family and we value each of you and your loyalty.

 

[Halfi]

I’ve been on both sides of that coin. I was an active addict for 15 years, 12 of those were IV drug user. I have now been clean off drugs since 2018. I’ve watched my self completley ruin close friendships and relationships with family. Completley pumbled my life with no regard. People cutting me off was the best thing for me.

I have also been on the other side, having a parent who struggles with addiction. I had to distance myself after I got clean. He’s potentially clean now and reeking the negatives from it and it fucking sucks to watch. I’m not ganna go to crazy with details but man is it a struggle to watch somebody go through it that I’m that close to. I’ve felt with it my whole life with a majority of people I surrounded my self with. It’s definitley not fun on either side of that fence.

Some shots I was roughly 120lbs soakin wet. And these weren’t even at the end of my run

 

[ldog]

I’ve been on both sides of that coin. I was an active addict for 15 years, 12 of those were IV drug user. I have now been clean off drugs since 2018. I’ve watched my self completley ruin close friendships and relationships with family. Completley pumbled my life with no regard. People cutting me off was the best thing for me.

I have also been on the other side, having a parent who struggles with addiction. I had to distance myself after I got clean. He’s potentially clean now and reeking the negatives from it and it fucking sucks to watch. I’m not ganna go to crazy with details but man is it a struggle to watch somebody go through it that I’m that close to. I’ve felt with it my whole life with a majority of people I surrounded my self with. It’s definitley not fun on either side of that fence.

Some shots I was roughly 120lbs soakin wet. And these weren’t even at the end of my run
View attachment 261229View attachment 261230

Powerful man….you’re a warrior.

 

[Skud008]

I’ve been on both sides of that coin. I was an active addict for 15 years, 12 of those were IV drug user. I have now been clean off drugs since 2018. I’ve watched my self completley ruin close friendships and relationships with family. Completley pumbled my life with no regard. People cutting me off was the best thing for me.

I have also been on the other side, having a parent who struggles with addiction. I had to distance myself after I got clean. He’s potentially clean now and reeking the negatives from it and it fucking sucks to watch. I’m not ganna go to crazy with details but man is it a struggle to watch somebody go through it that I’m that close to. I’ve felt with it my whole life with a majority of people I surrounded my self with. It’s definitley not fun on either side of that fence.

Some shots I was roughly 120lbs soakin wet. And these weren’t even at the end of my run
View attachment 261229View attachment 261230

That's about how small and emaciated I was when I quit everything. It's actually wild to look at pictures of myself back then, skinny but puffy and bloated, hollow eyes, fucked up teeth (holy shit I love modern dental technology), terrible skin... I honestly don't even recognize that person anymore, in the best way possible. You honestly could not pay me enough to have another drink or snort or whatever these days. No amount of money is worth giving up what I've built and going back to that mess, both physically and mentally.

 

[ldog]

That's about how small and emaciated I was when I quit everything. It's actually wild to look at pictures of myself back then, skinny but puffy and bloated, hollow eyes, fucked up teeth (holy shit I love modern dental technology), terrible skin... I honestly don't even recognize that person anymore, in the best way possible. You honestly could not pay me enough to have another drink or snort or whatever these days. No amount of money is worth giving up what I've built and going back to that mess, both physically and mentally.

Heck yeah man!

 

[Halfi]

That's about how small and emaciated I was when I quit everything. It's actually wild to look at pictures of myself back then, skinny but puffy and bloated, hollow eyes, fucked up teeth (holy shit I love modern dental technology), terrible skin... I honestly don't even recognize that person anymore, in the best way possible. You honestly could not pay me enough to have another drink or snort or whatever these days. No amount of money is worth giving up what I've built and going back to that mess, both physically and mentally.

I feel u on the teeth I got a whole new grill top and bottom. My mouth is worth almost as much as my car got none of my actual teeth left. But I would hands down live my life the same all over again. Without the triumphs of being in addiction, there’s no way I would be the person I am today.

 

[Skud008]

I feel u on the teeth I got a whole new grill top and bottom. My mouth is worth almost as much as my car got none of my actual teeth left. But I would hands down live my life the same all over again. Without the triumphs of being in addiction, there’s no way I would be the person I am today.

Yeah absolutely, couldn't agree more! I love who I am today and I would not be that person without going through all that. I might quit a couple years earlier to stack a few more gains before I get too old though lol

 

[samgraves82]

I remember when u 1st showed up BOP, come a long way.
U & i traveled a very similar path

U sure were there I forgot about that. It's been a journey for sure. It's nice to know there's still some people from my beginnings around. I was still natty when I showed up there

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[samgraves82]

I’ve been on both sides of that coin. I was an active addict for 15 years, 12 of those were IV drug user. I have now been clean off drugs since 2018. I’ve watched my self completley ruin close friendships and relationships with family. Completley pumbled my life with no regard. People cutting me off was the best thing for me.

I have also been on the other side, having a parent who struggles with addiction. I had to distance myself after I got clean. He’s potentially clean now and reeking the negatives from it and it fucking sucks to watch. I’m not ganna go to crazy with details but man is it a struggle to watch somebody go through it that I’m that close to. I’ve felt with it my whole life with a majority of people I surrounded my self with. It’s definitley not fun on either side of that fence.

Some shots I was roughly 120lbs soakin wet. And these weren’t even at the end of my run
View attachment 261229View attachment 261230

Man our timelines and habits like up almost perfectly. Them gd oxy 80s then Roxie's, then the morphine. I got out just as the H was getting big and the fent was just showing up too

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[Pickitupputitdown]

I have unfortunately. She was amazing when she chose to be. She began drifting and I asked her to slow down. It felt like that fueled it even further. She broke up with me and came back broke and asking me to support her I gave her the choice me or the drug. She said she chose me but I could tell something was off she said she couldn't commit and I told her I wasn't going to support a "friend" if she wanted to chose me I would support her. She screamed and yelled I told her all she wanted me for was to support her addiction she said I was wrong but I knew in my heart she wouldn't be acting like this without the drugs. I left I hope she finds peace but i cannot stand by and watch her go down that path and contribute towards it in anyway. It broke me up inside for a long time. I have no idea where she is now, But my life is much more peaceful. She blamed everything on me and I believed her for along time. Drugs are horrible they turn people into demons. I will never share my light with another human that chooses drugs. Its a waste of time.

 

[ldog]

I have unfortunately. She was amazing when she chose to be. She began drifting and I asked her to slow down. It felt like that fueled it even further. She broke up with me and came back broke and asking me to support her I gave her the choice me or the drug. She said she chose me but I could tell something was off she said she couldn't commit and I told her I wasn't going to support a "friend" if she wanted to chose me I would support her. She screamed and yelled I told her all she wanted me for was to support her addiction she said I was wrong but I knew in my heart she wouldn't be acting like this without the drugs. I left I hope she finds peace but i cannot stand by and watch her go down that path and contribute towards it in anyway. It broke me up inside for a long time. I have no idea where she is now, But my life is much more peaceful. She blamed everything on me and I believed her for along time. Drugs are horrible they turn people into demons. I will never share my light with another human that chooses drugs. Its a waste of time.

Grateful that you shared this with all of us.

 

[lottalead]

i did everything as a teen and early 20s but thanks to having epilepsy i cut down then had a child cut down more then another kid so had to work many more hours ---by 3rd kid i completely stop everything for good ---drank a few times for birthdays and shit cuz friends thought it would be fun to fuck me up lol----now every year or two wife and i will grab a bottle of wine but thats it------as far as having to leave close friends or family had to distance myself from quite a few

 

[ldog]

i did everything as a teen and early 20s but thanks to having epilepsy i cut down then had a child cut down more then another kid so had to work many more hours ---by 3rd kid i completely stop everything for good ---drank a few times for birthdays and shit cuz friends thought it would be fun to fuck me up lol----now every year or two wife and i will grab a bottle of wine but thats it------as far as having to leave close friends or family had to distance myself from quite a few

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