Hints if You're Not Sure You're OLD

[Multislacking]

Hints you're getting old:

The grandson watched me slowly bend over to pick up one of his toys off the floor. In his best 3yr old voice of wisdom, he asks "Grandpa, is your back KILLING you?"

 

[Oliolz]

White nose hairs

 

[Multislacking]

White nose hairs

Nose, ear, back...the wild rogue eyebrows are the worst.

 

[Augustine5I]

Nose, ear, back...the wild rogue eyebrows are the worst.

A good look is growing your nose hair so long it can be combed into your mustache. Girls love that shit.

 

[Forty01]

#3 Wipes...I don't care what anyone thinks about my butt hygiene. I'm gonna use them.

To add to your list:

1) AARP sends you mail daily

2) The waitress tries to give you the senior discount (and you take it because you enjoy saving money)

3) You no longer find yourself flirting with girls in bars, etc. Instead you're flirting with all the nurses you now see. And you suddenly realize you have a fetish for scrubs and panty lines.

Nurse: "You have such nice veins!"
Me: "That's nothing. I got this one you should see."

WIPES! Hahaha I have them in every bathroom and my gym bag

 

[Forty01]

#4 you are online forum illiterate and make a new guy post in the veterans forum because you’re a veteran and confusing one with the other….

 

[caladin]

Ear and back hair...
Something always hurting...
Bird watching....
Irritated when people walk on my lawn...
Being called fat Thor... by your daughter

 

[dale.c]

You have to get your ass shaved and hemorrhoid surgery


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[Macker1515]

Hair everywhere… the old lady is always telling to trim my nose hairs , and I’m always like “I just did yesterday “

 

[zionoir626]

You have to get your ass shaved and hemorrhoid surgery


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Damn it dale...that was my line..
When you forget how painless pissing was..
Z...

 

[musclemaxx]

No.1
A super hot chick calls you SIR...

No.2
If your log is moved to the Vet section...(Mont)

No.3
If you have to lie about why you're buying something.. I'm helping my father and that's why I'm getting baby wipes..

Feel free to add to this extensive list..

Disclaimer
For entertainment purposes only

No 4. Your cock does not wake up with you in the morning

 

[charles bacon]

you guys are funny as f--k , i needed a laugh , thank you

 

[Pete44]

After a heavy squat workout you piss blood...

Naw that’s something else

 

[01dragonslayer]

Standard topics of conversation when meeting friends for lunch or dinner: health ailments, kid updates, why is the music in this restaurant so loud?​

You recognize a pro-athlete's last name and can’t believe he isn’t retired. Then you realize it’s his son. (Or grandson.)​

You judge a movie by whether or not it can keep you awake.​

 

[zionoir626]

When you watch the same movie every night and your wife gives you shit..
Your honest reply...
I've never seen this one..!!
Z...

 

[HFO3]

Truth be told....you're not old util you decide you are, I guarantee Im older than most of you in this subforum ... fuck everyone of these funny comments made prior to my post, even though they are funny lol

 

[zionoir626]

^^^true ^^^
Love you Brother..!!!
Z...

 

[rdm]

This thread was a good read. I'm still a young buck but I feel it creeping up everyday!

 

[HFO3]

^^^true ^^^
Love you Brother..!!!
Z...

back at ya ...homie

 

[Fletcher]

1. When you spend more money on dietary supplements than you do on drugs! (Including AAS)

2. You no longer have car payments.

3. You leave the bar by 11pm bc you don't wanna be around "the idiot kids that show up after 11".

4. The "bar" you go to also has a great dinner menu and sells more entrees than drinks!

5. Even though you went to the bar on Saturday night, you're up at 7am on a Sunday chatting with other old people!

 

[Fletcher]

You might be old if you find yourself worrying about the birds outside when the winter weather turns bad. I may or may not have put some old bread outside for them...

Started feeding them last year!

 

[zionoir626]

When you have to plan your day strategically around clean restrooms, due to IBS...LOL
Z...

 

[HFO3]

No.1
A super hot chick calls you SIR...

No.2
If your log is moved to the Vet section...(Mont)

No.3
If you have to lie about why you're buying something.. I'm helping my father and that's why I'm getting baby wipes..

Feel free to add to this extensive list..

Disclaimer
For entertainment purposes only

it’s all in your head. come at me

 

[HFO3]

If youre not sure youre old you are in denial, and if you below 40 your still a spring chicken, period. or youre a pusssy

 

[zionoir626]

When a total stranger tells you..
You shit your pants .!!!
Z...

 

[Push50]

5. Being more forgetful.

Yeah, I was going to post something for the list! But I forgot what it was.


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[Multislacking]

When you discover it's possible to give yourself a hernia from coughing too much...

 

[JJB1]

Here’s one for you old fuckers:
Digging through your girl’s feminine period pads to stick on your underwear before the gym because your hemorrhoids are bleeding.

 

[Multislacking]

Here’s one for you old fuckers:
Digging through your girl’s feminine period pads to stick on your underwear before the gym because your hemorrhoids are bleeding.

If you're old enough, she ain't used those in over 10yrs. You're SOL.

 

[JJB1]

If you're old enough, she ain't used those in over 10yrs. You're SOL.

And that’s when you hit up your daughter hahaha