I think we all take Arnold's words a little too far when he said "the mirror is not to admire, it's to criticize." That's actually a paraphrase and probably shouldn't have quotes around it. Regardless, I think most of us take this mentality to whole different level. I mean, yea, Arnold said it and therefore it is up there with the commandments, but don't forget, Arnold also had tremendous, almost narcistic levels of confidence. He was also extremely motivated and positive; therefore, when he saw something he didn't like (i.e. his legs), he didn't get discouraged over it, he put on a pair of tights so he would have to see his weakness every time he passed a mirror and he went to the gym twice a day and hit legs three times a week until he was satisfied.
That said, body dysmorphia is no joke. It's crazy how, at least for me (and it sounds like for many of you as well), one comment can alter the entire day. Sometimes the comment is might be meant as a compliment, but I hear it differently. For example, one time I was out of the gym for almost two months due to an injury that I had been fighting through but realized I had to let it heal. I had also been working full time and going to night school on top of that, so my cortisol levels were already pretty high I'm guessing. Anyway, I cut back on my calorie intake since I wasn't using it up in the gym, and had just finished a light cycle of just Test E at 600 mg a week. By this time, I had been out of the gym for 2 months, off the gear, and only on a mild amount of Nolvadex. Now I think I was about 32 when this happened, which means I had about 16 - 17 years of lifting under my belt (with a few breaks here and there) and I had been completely natural till 30. looking back, of course I still had most of my gains from that cycle, not to mention that the muscle I built from 16 to 30 had given me a solid foundation. In fact, I think I pretty much just dropped the excess water weight being retained by the test, and although I decreased my daily calories, I kept my macros close to the same,just cut back on carbs and tried to keep it in the 1:1 or 1:1.5 protein:carb ratio. Anyway, I went tanning the same place I normally go and the girl at the counter always recognized me. This time, we do the "hi, how you doing, how you been" thing, and she adds that I look like I lost weight. She definitely meant it in a positive way, but I took as "damn your puny. Can you bench the bar by itself yet? I mean all that work, all those years, and you finally look just skinny instead of skinny fat." So, while avoiding eye contact because of my shame, I replied, "oh, yea, been real busy, hard to find time to eat" instead of, "oh, thanks, appreciate that." I probably came off as an ass-hole which always happens with insecure people. So back to the question about what I see in the mirror, not only is do I see something different than what most people see, I hear something different too.
But to answer the question, I'm most satisfied with what I see when I look at myself first thing in the am. That's when I think I look the most cut and leanest, and with that comes those separation lines, increased vascularity, especially after a few push-ups and some shadow boxing, and that's really the only time I can accidentally catch a glimpse of my serratus anterior popping out without having specifically tried to make it happen. Of course this is on good days. Other days I see someone who tries to lift and has some muscle, but would probably fall into the "dad bod" category even though, like everyone else has said, Other people see something much more positive. For years I've hear about body dysmorphia as if it's gender specific and applies to women and teenage girls who develop eating disorders, anorexia, bulimia, and so on. I had a very good friend who was actually my roommate when I was like 22 who had bulimia. I don't know what she threw up as she literally lived off of popcorn and egg whites (and not massive portions of egg whites like we eat). She had a large coffee in the am with skim milk and sugar. That was the only sugar she had all day and anytime she ate anything different, she would throw it up. I really cared about her but walked a thin line because if I said anything she'd close up and not tell me anything anymore. She only opened up to me because I wasn't judgmental or condescending and didn't preach at her with generic, uninformed statements about health. I just told her that I worried about her and that if she wanted help or to talk, that I'd be there. Dysmorphia with women is serious shit, and I'm by no means belittling it, but they tend to deal with it through eating disorders whereas men eventually resort to chemical use, starting with supplements, then to gear, then to hormones / peptides, and sometimes shit like insulin and other really dangerous stuff. Women also receive more sympathy and have support groups and shit. I'm not saying that they shouldn't, just that maybe men should too. Then again, these forums can be support groups in a lot of ways. Except there's always some ass-hole that is so insecure they have tear apart posts from people being vulnerable or sharing something personal that they are dealing with. That's one thing I love about the lifting community, stereotypes aside, most people who really live this life are positive, inspiring, and just encourage people to be their best and are always willing to help.