Is this her?
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We’ve all known someone or personally experienced infidelity on some level. Obviously, there are a variety of reasons people cheat. That said, cheating still leads to hurt that can and usually does take years to work through (assuming it’s a marriage and the decision has been made to work through it). This situation has repeat offender written all over it though. If she cheated with a guy from the gym in the past and she is still engaging in conversations that lead to phone numbers being exchanged....that bitch gotta go
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My question is, what was her excuse for cheating? This is important. Because if she blames you for it then yes, she’ll prolly do it again. Unhappy people should just leave rather than cheat and if she cheated because you made her unhappy then she is insecure and fears to be alone which means you’ll be walking on egg shells for the rest of your marriage.
if she takes full responsibility for it, then you can work on it.
a marriage counselor or a group session or therapist can help. It’s not like you can stop loving her, trust me I know your situation. It gets more difficult when kiddos are involved.
so the act of cheating is on her but it’s up to both of you to repair the damage.
my other advice is still good too because if you cant laugh at your misfortunes you will grow to be a cranky ‘get off my lawn’ type of old man.
blowjobs are the fountain of youth. And have you ever cheated? Been tempted?
I hope things work out for you, specially if you got kids. The family unit is worth fighting for but you can do it alone, she gotta be on board too
YepI wouldn’t worry about it. Only control what you can, which is you. Take it as a compliment and hopefully she only takes it as the same. Some guys are genuine with what they say and others have an underlying agenda and asking if she competes is an easy approach.
Cheat and I’m done. Divorce her
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If you have children it isn’t so easy.
The thought of another man raising your kids might change your mind.
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I have enough confidence in myself and her that I just take it as all compliment. It also boosts her self confidence so it's all good...plus ifbshe was willing to throw away what we share and built over that shit....well I guess I was wrong and wasted over a decade . Time to push on. Right.
Funny af...Dont kiss her on the mouth....just sayin......
Unless you end up with Hep A,B, and C.Send her my way and I'll do a taste test on all holes and get right back to you! (Just like our packs Less than 7 days)
I like your positive attitude sirMeh....all curable lol
Well, how could you not mention to us she cheated before?
That would change 100% of members advice. Kind of a big piece of this fucked up puzzle if you ask me...
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Well, how could you not mention to us she cheated before?
That would change 100% of members advice. Kind of a big piece of this fucked up puzzle if you ask me...
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YepExactly. This changes everything. OP is seeking approval to take her back.... not seeking advice.
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A little science on this:
1) 70% of women have cheated -- the same as men. More than two-thirds. This statistic spent many decades creeping upward since back in the 50's or so when it was first measured, and finally met parity with men around 2010 but likely earlier than that since these measurements are usually lagging the real trends, and getting sexual behavior stats out of women is like pulling teeth, even for researchers who guarantee anonymity and pay for it. Lots of research has shown the deciding factor is opportunity... the only reason women had a lower incidence previously was a lack thereof, e.g. being housewives and the mailman being unattractive, or perhaps being Islamic and therefore burka-clad and never allowed to be alone around strange men. Now that women in the US work nearly as much as men and get *more* university exposure (they earn 58% of all bachelors degrees) the opportunity is everywhere.
2) 12% of children who have a "dad" who thinks the child is his -- they ain't. That's 1-in-8 kids (and we're excluding stepchildren, adoptees, IVFs w/ sperm donors, etc... any obvious and openly known cases of non-DNA match) who have cuckolded "dads". Again, this excludes cases where the man agrees to raise stepchildren, etc. And this rate exists despite modern access to birth control, full knowledge of how ovulation cycles work, morning-after pills, and abortion. In nature the rate likely would be 30%+, and that's the rate we actually see today in terrible socioeconomic environments like ghettoes and methlab trailer parks. The point being, that 12% pregnancy/cuckold rate is MUCH lower than the actual cheating rate since women know how to avoid pregnancy when they want to.
Ok enough with the facts. Grim eh? Back to the rah rah feel-good bullshit, lol.
. . . people that don’t have the act of sexual intercourse have emotional relationships, no? Is that cheating? *coffee***
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Yep it is grim but it is true and a Good post CM if you’re a realist and have lived a minute .... we all know people cheat, it’s the baser needs of human behavior. man+woman= sex
Even the most loyal and conservative people that don’t have the act of sexual intercourse have emotional relationships, no? Is that cheating? *coffee***
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Yep it is grim but it is true and a Good post CM if you’re a realist and have lived a minute .... we all know people cheat, it’s the baser needs of human behavior. man+woman= sex
Even the most loyal and conservative people that don’t have the act of sexual intercourse have emotional relationships, no? Is that cheating? *coffee***
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Not necessarily. It's a matter of degree and extent. I've been good friends with a female coworker just because we shared the same dry sense of humor. We were close enough that we could almost tell what the other was going to say before saying it. We got along great. We were both happily married and there was no attempt on either side for a deeper/closer relationship. It probably would have queered the relationship we had. Only ran into her once outside of work (at a bar) and we chatted for a short time and went back to our other friends. If there were anything deeper between us then I'd agree that it could be considered a form of cheating. Degree and extent.
I don't care what anyone says, it can be a slippery slope.
Let's look at this from two perspectives including the same and opposite sex.
There is times I have had some interactions with dudes I didn't know too well, having more conversations and more interactions I realized he had a lot more in common and we gelled pretty well. And they became a part of my circle. But for obvious reasons not being attracted to the opposite sex it stops right there and it's just the brotherhood.
Now let's look at it from the other perspective. With the factor of being attracted to the opposite sex, naturally for the majority.
Having instances and occasions with conversations or hanging out with the opposite sex, same situations finding out that we gel pretty well with Good vibes. Naturally mixed signals unbeknownst to us may transpire, the more these interactions take place the greater the instance of misinterpreted signals or even authentic signals can be received. Unlike the brotherhood above, we are inclined to have more of a curiosity and desire to explore a bit further.
Can men and women be friends? Of course, but it's a slippery slope and there needs to be boundaries.
Comparing instances and situations is apples and oranges.
Because the majority of male and female encounters throughout history most likely transpired to something greater, even if just for a moment out of curiosity, lust, or desire, or even loneliness.
And as uncomfortable as it sounds let's talk about this, how many encounters with meeting a new dude transpired into something different? It's extremely extremely extremely rare, and practically it's not even worth mentioning because statistically the ratio is so low.
There's a reason why mankind says "lead me not into temptation".. morally we may not have the intent, but at the end of the day we are simply just a species like many others with a natural instinct to laws of Attraction.
For myself personally, whenever I speak to the opposite sex I go above and beyond to sound more professional, I washed my vocabulary and body language. And I probably end up sounding like a nerd and very dry, I don't use puns and if I notice an opportunity that one is presented I ignore it. Playful banter is where becomes a slippery slope..
Well I'm talking to dudes in the gym or on the job site, I don't notice these social cues, because they're simply not there!!! 酪酪
God that was really awkward to explain hahahahhahah!
unless you have an open marriage I dont see why your living on this one way street. and 2 wrongs dont make a right so dont think well she is cheating so so its cool for me to cheat, just get a divorce. I seen dudes stick it out before and it was because either the wife makes the bigger paycheck and the house and cars are in her name so without her your just a broke loser or they have kids and dont wanna pay child support