I think i hate my relationship

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  1. #16
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    Love trumps money. Everyday. Even when the bills are due, if itís real love that is... if itís fear or guilt then youíre already losing the battle.

    reflect, talk things out...

  2. #17
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    Quote Originally Posted by Milford King View Post
    Love trumps money. Everyday. Even when the bills are due, if itís real love that is... if itís fear or guilt then youíre already losing the battle.

    reflect, talk things out...
    Very true.. good point if its indeed true love it will work out

  3. #18
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    Quote Originally Posted by Milford King View Post
    Love trumps money. Everyday. Even when the bills are due, if itís real love that is... if itís fear or guilt then youíre already losing the battle.

    reflect, talk things out...
    Precisely. What if one day he hits it big? Say he gets his own company or hits the lotto? And let's say you get hurt, and the tables are turned? Now he's paying all the bills and you can't afford to help and he ditches you.


    If he gets cancer or another ailment, will you leave him then too?

  4. #19
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    Quote Originally Posted by WesleyInman View Post
    Precisely. What if one day he hits it big? Say he gets his own company or hits the lotto? And let's say you get hurt, and the tables are turned? Now he's paying all the bills and you can't afford to help and he ditches you.


    If he gets cancer or another ailment, will you leave him then too?
    Sounds like he doesn't have the motivation to do so. Lottery isn't going to happen. Only real solutions are worth pursuing.

    If he isn't motivated to move forward (judging by the growing thing it sounds like he doesn't want to work for anyone) and that isn't okay with you I would get everything ready to go. Develop your solution to continue moving forward in life.

    Back pain isn't a reason not to work. I damaged my cervical spine in an accident in Afghanistan that causes me what I thought was intolerable pain (and many other problems I have)...I learned how to deal with it. Sometimes it's defeating and I can't do what I want, but I can usually push though and make things happen. I found a profession that doesn't require physical labor where I can work my way to decently high pay. Then once I have the money saved I'm going to start my own business. My dad broke his back twice and neck once. Still worked until he was 75. The point is, if there is a will, there is always a way.

    His injury was already there. When they got together he quit his job and hasn't tried to get one since...meaning he can work but doesn't want to. So his injury isn't intolerable. He'd just rather take pain meds and sit on the couch.

    Sorry to sound harsh, but reality oftentimes is. I'm obviously speculating here some, so correct me if I'm wrong.

  5. #20
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    Quote Originally Posted by Milford King View Post
    Love trumps money. Everyday. Even when the bills are due, if itís real love that is... if itís fear or guilt then youíre already losing the battle.

    reflect, talk things out...
    Theres no talking though. Thats part of problem. Its like im not allowed to be frustrated about the situation or have concerns.

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  6. #21
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    Quote Originally Posted by WesleyInman View Post
    Precisely. What if one day he hits it big? Say he gets his own company or hits the lotto? And let's say you get hurt, and the tables are turned? Now he's paying all the bills and you can't afford to help and he ditches you.


    If he gets cancer or another ailment, will you leave him then too?
    Its really not about hitting it big. Its me carrying the weight of everything. Hes got health issues bro. He broke his back. Hes got a plate and screws holding his lower spine together. Hes got a torn acl and mcl. Dudes fucked up. Health isn't the issue. And money isn't everything but im not the type person to put everything on one person. Ive always handled my own. I took on allll this shit maybe 5 months into the relationship. Which is my fault yes but its put a huge damper on the relationship. The relationship never got to blossom before the flood came. Yano.

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  7. #22
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    Quote Originally Posted by GarlicChicken View Post
    Sounds like he doesn't have the motivation to do so. Lottery isn't going to happen. Only real solutions are worth pursuing.

    If he isn't motivated to move forward (judging by the growing thing it sounds like he doesn't want to work for anyone) and that isn't okay with you I would get everything ready to go. Develop your solution to continue moving forward in life.

    Back pain isn't a reason not to work. I damaged my cervical spine in an accident in Afghanistan that causes me what I thought was intolerable pain (and many other problems I have)...I learned how to deal with it. Sometimes it's defeating and I can't do what I want, but I can usually push though and make things happen. I found a profession that doesn't require physical labor where I can work my way to decently high pay. Then once I have the money saved I'm going to start my own business. My dad broke his back twice and neck once. Still worked until he was 75. The point is, if there is a will, there is always a way.

    His injury was already there. When they got together he quit his job and hasn't tried to get one since...meaning he can work but doesn't want to. So his injury isn't intolerable. He'd just rather take pain meds and sit on the couch.

    Sorry to sound harsh, but reality oftentimes is. I'm obviously speculating here some, so correct me if I'm wrong.
    Slighty.
    Hes a health and fitness coach. And at least a dozen ceritifications and specializations. Stupid smart with human body. Works thru the pain. But, doesnt want to work for anyone. He does some online coaching but the money isn't good enough in it and he doesnt want to work in a gym. Babe is fucking smart man. Its stupid. He just doesnt want to be on his feet all day. And he does not take pain pills. He smokes to alleviate the pain and is not lazy. He remodeled our house...but i funded it. I am thankful. He does do quite a bit but the stuff he does do doesnt pay the bills. Hes got food stamps but 190 dollars a month and im greatful for that it helps, but it doesnt last long and then im charging the credit card to get people fed. Hes a body builder as well. Hes in the gym 4 or 5 days a week. Which also why i dont get it. Like you can remodel a house and stay in the gym but you dont want to get a regular job to help until the social security or grow takes off. Im okay with the grow. Its legal where we live. But is that something you can do for 20+ years idk. Maybe. Im just in my head. Im not ready to call it but idk how hunkeydory i can be pretending like im okay until something comes in. Which also effects the relationship because i can cold as fuck.

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  8. #23
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    this situuation iis an onnoin, tooo manny layers. bottom line sshould be if youu love the guyy or not. if not then leave. there is a rreason wedding vows are "for better or worse" I thhink peopple run too easily these daays when there is adversity

    PS i have no iddea why my keyboard is doubling lettters

  9. #24
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    I know many many folks that work with messed up backs. I'm one of them.

    Excuses are just excuses. Man needs to work period.

  10. #25
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    If the dude can't honestly take care of you or somewhat throw in and you have a problem with being his sugar momma (which is what it sounds like) bounce like a bouncy ball jumping outta the quarter machine !!!!

  11. #26
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    Quote Originally Posted by dobs27 View Post
    Slighty.
    Hes a health and fitness coach. And at least a dozen ceritifications and specializations. Stupid smart with human body. Works thru the pain. But, doesnt want to work for anyone. He does some online coaching but the money isn't good enough in it and he doesnt want to work in a gym. Babe is fucking smart man. Its stupid. He just doesnt want to be on his feet all day. And he does not take pain pills. He smokes to alleviate the pain and is not lazy. He remodeled our house...but i funded it. I am thankful. He does do quite a bit but the stuff he does do doesnt pay the bills. Hes got food stamps but 190 dollars a month and im greatful for that it helps, but it doesnt last long and then im charging the credit card to get people fed. Hes a body builder as well. Hes in the gym 4 or 5 days a week. Which also why i dont get it. Like you can remodel a house and stay in the gym but you dont want to get a regular job to help until the social security or grow takes off. Im okay with the grow. Its legal where we live. But is that something you can do for 20+ years idk. Maybe. Im just in my head. Im not ready to call it but idk how hunkeydory i can be pretending like im okay until something comes in. Which also effects the relationship because i can cold as fuck.

    Sent from my SM-G892U using Tapatalk
    How the fuck you a bodybuilder in the gym 4or5 days a week but can't fucking work !!!!!!!!!!!! Get rid of this tool Queen !!

  12. #27
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    women, you work too much, I was lonely and started banging other dudes
    also women, you dont work enough, I met some guy that works his ass off and we are banging now

  13. #28
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    Quote Originally Posted by dobs27 View Post
    Slighty.
    Hes a health and fitness coach. And at least a dozen ceritifications and specializations. Stupid smart with human body. Works thru the pain. But, doesnt want to work for anyone. He does some online coaching but the money isn't good enough in it and he doesnt want to work in a gym. Babe is fucking smart man. Its stupid. He just doesnt want to be on his feet all day. And he does not take pain pills. He smokes to alleviate the pain and is not lazy. He remodeled our house...but i funded it. I am thankful. He does do quite a bit but the stuff he does do doesnt pay the bills. Hes got food stamps but 190 dollars a month and im greatful for that it helps, but it doesnt last long and then im charging the credit card to get people fed. Hes a body builder as well. Hes in the gym 4 or 5 days a week. Which also why i dont get it. Like you can remodel a house and stay in the gym but you dont want to get a regular job to help until the social security or grow takes off. Im okay with the grow. Its legal where we live. But is that something you can do for 20+ years idk. Maybe. Im just in my head. Im not ready to call it but idk how hunkeydory i can be pretending like im okay until something comes in. Which also effects the relationship because i can cold as fuck.

    Sent from my SM-G892U using Tapatalk
    As a man, I couldn't see how letting you go off to work everyday while I stay home self medicating, would sit well with me.

    IMO you have or are losing respect for him. And you are resenting him for not pulling his own weight.

    Fuck...he wants to be his own boss? It's a nice fucking dream. Not a reality for most, despite the desire to do so. What would he be a boss doing?? Considering he can't work do to his bad back.

    It's pretty embarrassing to be with this guy on Govt assistance collecting food stamps.

    You can do what you want. Just know you are going into this with eyes open. These aren't circumstances that befell you both after being together for some time.

    Remember what I said before...and keep in mind, YOU DON'T OWE HIM A LIFE.

  14. #29
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    I work mad hours and my wife stays home and takes care of the kids, she cooks and cleans. she lets me know she really appreciates that I work hard for our family. you never hear a guy complain about that because that is our accepted role in life to be the provider. Women really cant stand to see their man sit at home, its like the are sizing themselves up with other women and need to upgrade to a better situation

  15. #30
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    Crazy shit.. matters of the heart are complicated. Initially i was under the impression that maybe there was some misunderstanding that could be hashed out but you continue to paint a pretty clear picture of the guys character. Not sure what drew you guys together initially but i know alot of guys talk shit to get the pussy.. sorry.."win over a womans heart", then its not untill later you realize maybe i was duped..lol.. Either way sounds like you genuinely fell for him cause part of you defends him. But the guy is capable of working period. He just doesn't want to and is gonna wait and see if plan A the govt will take care of him or B hopefully the grow may work out which by the way is highly expensive to run and operate. I too am a vet and like garlic chicken have cervical damage, shrapnel on my legs, lumbar damage the list goes on and i get up, get out and provide for my family. If he really gave a shit with the same energy he uses to get out and workout 5 days a week he could at least do some part time work and help you out. Not sure how a capable working man could watch his woman go out and work her ass off while he trains 5 days a week and then goes home to smoke some weed and chill. I do wish you the best though... good luck with whatever you decide..

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