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What's Going on with You Guys!

MGM

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Get Shredded!
Hey Guys ,


Haven't been on here in sometime actually posting but some of you guys know me and some are new that I've just Simply read your post lately. Anyway , Figured I would start this thread simply because I've had a hell of a last year and a half since Covid and really struggling with my marriage . I figured this thread could be for guys like me or anyone that has no one to talk too in there daily life and just a way to vent to each other and get support (No Homo sorry Killsong or whatever your name is(Ps I'm ok with Gay guys) I have quite a few kiddos and a very busy life and really have no friends these days other then my employees at work and there is only so close to them you can be .

So Anyway ................... I would like some opinions on what is going on with me and my marriage . Basically about 4 years ago I start getting chicks messaging me on facebook etc ................ My wife for many years has not been very sexually active and basically I've gotten it once a month maybe 2 for the past like 8 years or so . So when good looking chicks are messaging it's hard not to message back . I've messaged these women , they sent pics etc (I'm not the type to send dick pics or anything but did send occasional flexing pic or something . Long story short and Ya'll already know she found out ! Told her I would get off Facebook etc and did and still am . But ever since this has happened I just feel like she's watching me like a hawk ................like you can't even look at your phone in front of her etc because she's that chick that asks who's messaging etc but has way more people than me messaging her but I'm not asking her and being all nosy . So here come's 2020 I got tired of it and created a fake facebook profile wtf ( yea I know kinda whack but what's a man to do ) So no kidding after talking to multiple women on there I get a crazy bitch that I never should've been talking too and she was interested but evidently she had a boyfriend . Well being the shitty people there are in the world today he figured out who I was and eventually messaged my wife pics of me (I was actually at my daughters ball game when this happened wtf!) So we go home the same night and she basically goes off the rails and makes me go in the other room and tell my children why I would be leaving etc!! ( Total bullshit I would have never done that too her and wouldn't want the hurt for my children ) Let me make this clear and I'm 150% being honest ...............I've never physically cheated on her nothing but have talked to many chicks over the last 4 years . So I'm gone for 2 weeks and damn near drank myself to death and she agrees to let me come back , I was fucking lost just didn't know what to do I've been With this woman 15+ years and we have 5kids .

So guys since I've came back it's been so weird ......If I go to the living room which I have done at night time to watch tv she dang near comes out and says "Back to the same old shit! " Which is pointing out that I'm in there messaging people which I haven't been the last 10 months . We have gotten into argument after argument and she literally is just trying to hurt me for what I've done and when we talk she can't even talk it's just yelling and popping off stuff about what I did so the whole house can hear it which in my opinion is so disrespectful . I'm having a very hard time loving her and wanting to be with her now and on top of all of this about middle of 20 she started having pain in her neck and a swollen nipple and turns out she has some pre cancerous cells in her coochie which from what I've seen is super common in women these days . So? Sorry for the long ass post but some input would be nice . Questions ?

You guys post up as well if anything eating on you. Also I am lifting alot still and cardio but also drinking alot so you know how that goes (No Gains)

Thx Mac
 
Wow.

Welcome back Mac...and try to stay outta trouble!
 
Seems the ol' lady lowered the boom on Big Mac apparently.
 
Seems the ol' lady lowered the boom on Big Mac apparently.
Bro I'm still at the house but it's crazy she just is expecting a certain answer for every question and evidently they haven't been right lol . The worst part is the kiddos . I have raised and adopted 4 of them and 1 true blood and absolutely consider all of them mine and will forever . What they have seen In the last year I feel has lowered there respect for me especially the way she goes about it . The youngest guy is just 7 and the others grown up or teenagers .
 
You have to try and rekindle and spark the romance ....do to her what you would do to other hot chicks!! If that fails then proceed .....
 
Twisted texted me and told me to ask what the 'big' in BIG MAC that Tinynutzz mentioned was all about.
I personally don't care cuz if ur on this site that means - just like the rest of them-have entirely too much muscle for this gay guy.
76b80d0d5795e85102018c48391d4652.gif
 
Find a quality marriage counselor in your area asap. If you have a couple of visits and don't like the counselor, find another one. Communication is the biggest factor (as a guy, it seems lame, but it's truth). She is going to keep throwing this in your face, so you're going to have to be prepared just to let her vent. Go fishing in your mind or whatever brings you peace while she's railing. At least you've been faithful, most guys wouldn't.
 
If you want to save this make her feel like a star. Get her involved with shit your doing; otherwise, I can promise the shit will get worse.

1....Tell her you wish you could take back anything you have done to hurt her and you don't know what the fuck is wrong with you. Now this is probably all lies but we gotta do what we gotta do. While you're doing this open a new ring and give it to her while playing some sappy BS like from this moment by Shania Twain. Tell her you want this to be a new beginning and if she accepts the ring it should be.

2.....Or another thought that will make a girl treat her partner like that is in reality she is fucking someone. You would be surprised the women that do that shit. Some hypocritical bitches on this earth. I lived with one way to long.

3.....Or another thought you have all these hot ass girls messaging you move on and rid yourself of her ass.

I am sappy mother fucker when it comes to my girls. I would start with #1 then if that shit goes south I would swear she was doing #2 and move on to #3

Good luck
 
2.....Or another thought that will make a girl treat her partner like that is in reality she is fucking someone. You would be surprised the women that do that shit. Some hypocritical bitches on this earth. I lived with one way to long.

^ This is a distinct possibility and you should prepare yourself accordingly. Chances are if she did, it *will* come out in counseling.
 
IML Gear Cream!
Find a quality marriage counselor in your area asap. If you have a couple of visits and don't like the counselor, find another one. Communication is the biggest factor (as a guy, it seems lame, but it's truth). She is going to keep throwing this in your face, so you're going to have to be prepared just to let her vent. Go fishing in your mind or whatever brings you peace while she's railing. At least you've been faithful, most guys wouldn't.
Thanks bubba , We have had appointments set up and she finally went to someone last week and they told her to do more "wifely duties" cooking etc . I'm the guy that cooks most the time and enjoy it and def don't care about cooking just want to be treated good and respected and she shows her ass weekly and then we are back to square one
 
If you want to save this make her feel like a star. Get her involved with shit your doing; otherwise, I can promise the shit will get worse.

1....Tell her you wish you could take back anything you have done to hurt her and you don't know what the fuck is wrong with you. Now this is probably all lies but we gotta do what we gotta do. While you're doing this open a new ring and give it to her while playing some sappy BS like from this moment by Shania Twain. Tell her you want this to be a new beginning and if she accepts the ring it should be.

2.....Or another thought that will make a girl treat her partner like that is in reality she is fucking someone. You would be surprised the women that do that shit. Some hypocritical bitches on this earth. I lived with one way to long.

3.....Or another thought you have all these hot ass girls messaging you move on and rid yourself of her ass.

I am sappy mother fucker when it comes to my girls. I would start with #1 then if that shit goes south I would swear she was doing #2 and move on to #3

Good luck

Man she is too naive for that Brother but this shit is funny af lol . She's 41 and been with 4 men and not really the best lover .................My parents have seen there grandkids about 3 times in the last year and a half and she has a vendetta for them I think as well . Also we live right next to her mom and dad and sister and brother in law and my oldest son Lives with them . Yea tell me about it . It just seems I'm this piece of shit to everyone now
 
Thanks bubba , We have had appointments set up and she finally went to someone last week and they told her to do more "wifely duties" cooking etc . I'm the guy that cooks most the time and enjoy it and def don't care about cooking just want to be treated good and respected and she shows her ass weekly and then we are back to square one

That's the first step. You all didn't get to the place you're in overnight and it won't be fixed overnight. It will be a process. It sounds like you may have a decent counselor. Counselors that recommend actions and not simply "read this book". Like I said, it will take a few visits to get a good feel. Usually writing exercises are helpful. You don't have to be a great poet or wordsmith. But it helps to get your thoughts in order and put them on paper. Not just for her, but for you too. You may surprise yourself with the conclusions you come to.
 
Man she is too naive for that Brother but this shit is funny af lol . She's 41 and been with 4 men and not really the best lover .................My parents have seen there grandkids about 3 times in the last year and a half and she has a vendetta for them I think as well . Also we live right next to her mom and dad and sister and brother in law and my oldest son Lives with them . Yea tell me about it . It just seems I'm this piece of shit to everyone now

Hate to say it, but your living situation may be the biggest factor in your relationship. How is *your* relationship with the in-laws? Are they backing her up and egging her on or do they see her behavior for what it is and respect you?
 
Hate to say it, but your living situation may be the biggest factor in your relationship. How is *your* relationship with the in-laws? Are they backing her up and egging her on or do they see her behavior for what it is and respect you?

Man Honestly they were very nice when I was a hot mess and kicked out but they are churchy folks "now" not there whole life but now for sure . They and the aunt and uncle have always been judgemental on things at "our" house . And ps no one knows what I'm going thru between me and her and how she is acting crazy . I'm not gonna live in fear of doing this or that because of the way she want's me to be . We literally had new floors put down , a deck , ceiling fans , trim , etc in the last few weeks and none of it was really ran by me or asked if I could do it etc . She just always does shit herself and has her dad do it .............. I'm the trashman the strong guy that pulls up the carpet but not smart enough to put down the floor or build the deck (which is bs ) I'm pretty mechanical and a working man
 
Man Honestly they were very nice when I was a hot mess and kicked out but they are churchy folks "now" not there whole life but now for sure . They and the aunt and uncle have always been judgemental on things at "our" house . And ps no one knows what I'm going thru between me and her and how she is acting crazy . I'm not gonna live in fear of doing this or that because of the way she want's me to be . We literally had new floors put down , a deck , ceiling fans , trim , etc in the last few weeks and none of it was really ran by me or asked if I could do it etc . She just always does shit herself and has her dad do it .............. I'm the trashman the strong guy that pulls up the carpet but not smart enough to put down the floor or build the deck (which is bs ) I'm pretty mechanical and a working man

I may be reading the situation wrong, but judging from past experience, she is likely leaning on her family instead of leaning on you. Hopefully the counselor pushes the fact that she "chose you". But with them living that close, they are always going to be in your (and her's) business. That is going to add a whole 'nother layer to things that sucks. If you continue to live next to them and she can't work thru it, it will make it a nightmare for you. If you think things are worth saving, it may take moving. Even then, if she's texting with them 24x7, etc it may still be a nightmare. They may not be directly trashing you, but they can definitely be obstacles in your relationship.
 
Twisted texted me and told me to ask what the 'big' in BIG MAC that Tinynutzz mentioned was all about.
I personally don't care cuz if ur on this site that means - just like the rest of them-have entirely too much muscle for this gay guy.
76b80d0d5795e85102018c48391d4652.gif

....
 
I may be reading the situation wrong, but judging from past experience, she is likely leaning on her family instead of leaning on you. Hopefully the counselor pushes the fact that she "chose you". But with them living that close, they are always going to be in your (and her's) business. That is going to add a whole 'nother layer to things that sucks. If you continue to live next to them and she can't work thru it, it will make it a nightmare for you. If you think things are worth saving, it may take moving. Even then, if she's texting with them 24x7, etc it may still be a nightmare. They may not be directly trashing you, but they can definitely be obstacles in your relationship.
Nah the wifey is struggling with just telling me every week that I made the vows and disrespected her and how bad I am . The only family struggling with it is my kiddos , My son is a adult and has wrote me off kinda because of this even tho I raised him and his sperm donor signed him away and hasn't seen him in 10 years . My wife has told me to kick rocks so many times over the years even before the ladies were hitting me up . It's not cool to be told to get tf out of your own house etc . I think the cancer thing is getting to her and it's like she want's to be pampered and she doesn't realize the hate and disrespect she's throwing me .
 
I think you should give some hard thought on whether or not you want to be in the relationship with your wife. I know I’m only getting one side of the story here but a woman that shit talks you to her family, to your kids, doesn’t cook, bosses you around and doesn’t put out? No wonder you’re looking for attention elsewhere.

I would stop ceding any ground to her whatsoever and start progressively pushing the onus onto her. I see it too often, men who cede every inch early in a relationship get walked all over in the long run. Granted I don’t know if that is the case with you but it sounds like you’ve let her have her way far too many times.

Yeah you fucked up but you never banged anyone and it sounds like she’s been judgey and inconsiderate for some time now.

You say you’re youngest is 7 so you’ve got 2 options from what I can see. Either you start to assert yourself, perhaps with the assistance of a marriage counselor if things are truly the way you portray them or you look at getting a divorce.

Nobody can tough that shit out for 11 years and you’ll end up doing more harm than good for your kids if you try.
 
Bro I'm still at the house but it's crazy she just is expecting a certain answer for every question and evidently they haven't been right lol . The worst part is the kiddos . I have raised and adopted 4 of them and 1 true blood and absolutely consider all of them mine and will forever . What they have seen In the last year I feel has lowered there respect for me especially the way she goes about it . The youngest guy is just 7 and the others grown up or teenagers .

Kind of fuck led up to use the kids as weapons… leave em out of wtf is up with that?

I remember my dad pulling me into all the drama with my moms affair and it fucked me up bad. That shits heavy for a kid.
 
Get Shredded!
I think you should give some hard thought on whether or not you want to be in the relationship with your wife. I know I’m only getting one side of the story here but a woman that shit talks you to her family, to your kids, doesn’t cook, bosses you around and doesn’t put out? No wonder you’re looking for attention elsewhere.

I would stop ceding any ground to her whatsoever and start progressively pushing the onus onto her. I see it too often, men who cede every inch early in a relationship get walked all over in the long run. Granted I don’t know if that is the case with you but it sounds like you’ve let her have her way far too many times.

Yeah you fucked up but you never banged anyone and it sounds like she’s been judgey and inconsiderate for some time now.

You say you’re youngest is 7 so you’ve got 2 options from what I can see. Either you start to assert yourself, perhaps with the assistance of a marriage counselor if things are truly the way you portray them or you look at getting a divorce.

Nobody can tough that shit out for 11 years and you’ll end up doing more harm than good for your kids if you try.
She actually does cook once or twice a week and good but that just isn't a big deal to me etc . She's a great mother , not lazy cleans like crazy , just bossy , was divorced before me , hasn't put out etc but she doesn't like rap music I do , doesn't like horror , video games , has always hated on me about lifting weights and not really supported it, would totally not be cool with gear , hell a buddy from the gym gave me a india viagra few years back brand new in blister pack and she found it and acted like I would get arrested because it wasn't prescription lmao . Ps I really appreciate you guys input and will ask admin to take this thread down I totally don't want one about just my shit . Thx Fellas
 
You still got my email bro?

ive been in your shoes with the no sex thing .... and the hypocrisy involved in constantly being accused of cheating.


I kept it together for my kiddos and I don’t regret it but I put my foot down pretty hard when I have to. Sounds like your wife has no respect for you.

however, her coochie cancer thing might have something to do with libido.... and something about having kids and being busy just sucks the horny-ness right outta woman.

If she’s cutting you down in front of your kids that’s a hard no go for me. Put that bitch in her place, she’ll respect you more for it. That shit stops or you’re better off starting over... gonna suck financially but I’d rather be broke than miserable... plus then you can get laid....

but.... sex ain’t everything (I know it’s hard to believe especially on the juice)....

you need to take a long hard look at yourself... and what you really want in your future.

I been going to AA (well I went once so far) to cut back on alcohol. Stress is definitely a trigger for me.. so I can relate to that. I know you’re already busy as fuck but staying busy helps too...

take your kids on and outing with you and make memories and forge a stronger bond every chance you get.
 
I couldn’t get my wife far from her mom too. I’ve had to set her (mom in law) straight twice in the last 15 years. We get along great now. By the way...

it’s a sad reality but your wife and her family need to be reminded that your the man of your domain. You fucked up... admit it, apologize ... explain to your wife you need her to figure out her libido issues because a man needs love... put the bottle down ... then press forward and put it behind you.

if you want to save your family you’d better stop talking to the sluts too.

ultimately, it’s your decision.

I’m just telling you my experience and opinions... I don’t sleep on the couch ever anymore. She wants out, she knows which way the door swings and she knows I’m just psycho enough to make a new door through the wall for her if I have to. Lol
 
Dude you have allowed your wife to cut you off from your own support system (your family) while completely entrenching you in her her support system ( her family), so you will never get a fair shake there, like my father in law told me "blood is thicker than water" and I told him this is my house and I make the rules here.

In todays woke society emotional cheating is as bad as physical cheating, this is why the wife and I don't have facebook, we feel it is a marriage destroyer, bored assholes from high school looking through their 25 year old year book wondering what other people are up to. It's a fucking trap and easy to get caught up in. anyway your life is upside down because "hot chicks" were dropping pics in your inbox and you like a dummy did not protect your privacy, 100% your fault and now you have to deal with the fallout.

Step 1 is you must get your balls back from her, no man can live under the thumb of a woman like that, the stress will eat you alive, even tho I believe she has controlled you long before the pics were seen, thats why you live next to her ma and pa and never see your own parents. That is a calculated move on her part and sleeping at the wheel on your part.
In my opinion you need to slowly take your manhood back, you didn't lose it overnight and you will not regain it back overnight, but you must start asserting yourself, not everything has to be a war but put away the white flag, stand your ground, always remind her that acting like a bitch in front of the kids have long lasting affects on them.

If you know your phone is clean and no surprises are going to pop up, let her have the lock code, leave it laying around unattended so she can pick it up if she wants to, but she also must know that is a two way street, her phone needs to be an open book also.

At the end of day you can not live the way you are now and if getting out is the only answer than thats a decision you will have to make, it's going to be the hardest desion you will ever make but remember she has already made that decision once in her life and it will be easier for her. Sometimes staying together for the sake of the kids is the worst decision for the kids, because it is an indirest abusive enviorment for them, constant yelling and argueing sends them into depression and that is not a good thing.
Good Luck Man, I hope it works out even if you are only taking baby steps in the right direction.

P.S. Is she Italian or Scorpio or both?...:coffee:
 
I’m just telling you my experience and opinions... I don’t sleep on the couch ever anymore. She wants out, she knows which way the door swings and she knows I’m just psycho enough to make a new door through the wall for her if I have to. Lol


tenor.gif
 
I wish I had filed for divorce many years ago. Now, it's too late. Regardless of who files, me or her, I will wind up paying her alimony for the rest of my life. She deserves nothing. We don't even talk anymore. We are just two people who happen to live in the same house. We've been married for four decades now and the only thing I know for sure is that tomorrow I will be even more miserable than I am today. I sincerely believe that two people are just not meant to be together as long as we have been. The only light at the end of the tunnel is that I have an exit strategy I plan to execute as soon as my daughter is old enough to be on her own.

I read many years ago that marriage starts out with, "anywhere sex." Anywhere sex is when two people fuck like rabbits anywhere and everywhere. Marriage then progresses to, "bedroom sex." You satisfy each other's needs but it's nothing exciting. Marriage ends in, "hallway sex" where you both just say, "Fuck you" as you pass each other in the hallway. We're way past hallway sex and don't even say fuck you to each other anymore.

Anyway, I don't know anymore than what I've read in this thread but your ol lady sounds like an emotional bully. It's not surprising because most women are. As painful as it will be, I highly recommend getting a divorce while you're still young enough to rebuild your life. Going through the process will suck, but in the end you'll be much happier.
 
I have been married 39 years and am in a good place now but we have crashed the boat a few times in 39 years, my wife says that after the kids are out marriage should be like a drivers licence, every four years you get to evaluate and move on freely if both parties want to go that way...:coffee:
 
yeah boss- these guys have given u some GREAT advice. my first wife was beautiful, smart, great job-BUT- The whole 10 yrs we were married she was just waiting on me to cheat- and you'll never make it when this is the case. Now granted, she had a good reason to be that way- my behavior BEFORE we got married and BEFORE I met her was atrocious, BUT I made up my mind I wasn't gonna cheat- NO MATTER WHAT-and I didn't. BUT a man cannot live that way- constantly being watched and being berated will drive u CRAZY man. She finally pushed me so far that I raised my hand and I knew it was time to go and I did and it sucked- had to pay that bitch 872.00 a month for 84 months simply because of the DURATION of our marriage(she got a much better lawyer than me). Anyway bro- u got to ask urself if it's worth it to go thru some SERIOUS therapy and too me your biggest question is- Is she willing to change along w/ u or does she think ur the only one that needs changing- AND- is she willing to move- u need to get away from her family bro or she will ALWAYS be right- they will see too it. Anyway there's no easy answer to this- but I totally agree w/ necron(and reddog and milf). DO NOT stay for the kids-never works- and DO NOT stay and be miserable man- LIFE'S TOO SHORT- and there's more where she came from bud! Good Luck my man!
 
The ol lady, who used to fancy herself a good wife, once said to me, "You know you'll never find another woman who treats you as well as I do." My reply shocked her. "You think this is about me wanting to be with someone else? After being with you I never want to be with another woman as long as I live." She used to care about herself and took care of herself. Now, she just doesn't give a fuck, got disgustingly obese, and has the nastiest disposition you can imagine.

If I knew as a young man what I know today, I never would have been married to anyone - ever. That's the single biggest mistake I ever made and boy has it cost me. Marriage benefits women, not men.
 
My wife is 60 and still looks close to the pic in my avi, she is a decent person and after the 40 years of growing pains we are in a fairly decent place, but I did call her a cunt two weeks ago because she was running off at the mouth, breaking my balls for no reason. Thats unacceptable to me. See I know it's a war not a skirmish and every hill has to be fought for, any real estate you freely give up is real estate you never get back, see i might have called her a cunt but 2 minutes later i was bringing her a cup of coffee, she pushed a little to hard over nothing and I reminded her I am not her son and will not tolerate getting my balls broke because she felt like doing it, and don't worry fellas she has some nice pet names for me too....:coffee:
 
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