Funny Thread

Page 25 of 26 FirstFirst ... 15212223242526 LastLast
Results 361 to 375 of 388

Thread: Funny Thread

  1. #361
    THE GROWTH CLINIC
    jolter604's Avatar


    Join Date
    May 2015
    Location
    the moon
    Posts
    2,219

    Thanks Thanks Given 
    731
    Thanks Thanks Received 
    171
    Thanked in
    137 Posts
    Rep Points
    2147483647

    Quote Originally Posted by Multislacking View Post
    Lmao
    At the kitty cave

  2. #362
    Senior Member
    Multislacking's Avatar


    Join Date
    Sep 2015
    Posts
    3,853

    Thanks Thanks Given 
    2,287
    Thanks Thanks Received 
    1,065
    Thanked in
    695 Posts
    Rep Points
    2147483647

    ...
    Attached Images Attached Images

  3. #363
    THE GROWTH CLINIC
    jolter604's Avatar


    Join Date
    May 2015
    Location
    the moon
    Posts
    2,219

    Thanks Thanks Given 
    731
    Thanks Thanks Received 
    171
    Thanked in
    137 Posts
    Rep Points
    2147483647

    Boom

  4. #364
    THE GROWTH CLINIC
    jolter604's Avatar


    Join Date
    May 2015
    Location
    the moon
    Posts
    2,219

    Thanks Thanks Given 
    731
    Thanks Thanks Received 
    171
    Thanked in
    137 Posts
    Rep Points
    2147483647

    Slap

  5. #365
    Junior Member
    GFM24's Avatar


    Join Date
    Apr 2019
    Posts
    4

    Thanks Thanks Given 
    0
    Thanks Thanks Received 
    3
    Thanked in
    2 Posts
    Rep Points
    30100


  6. #366
    Senior Member
    Multislacking's Avatar


    Join Date
    Sep 2015
    Posts
    3,853

    Thanks Thanks Given 
    2,287
    Thanks Thanks Received 
    1,065
    Thanked in
    695 Posts
    Rep Points
    2147483647


  7. #367
    Swollen Member
    Poirot's Avatar


    Join Date
    Sep 2014
    Location
    Your mom's house
    Posts
    5,367

    Thanks Thanks Given 
    429
    Thanks Thanks Received 
    700
    Thanked in
    486 Posts
    Rep Points
    2147483647

    What happens when you drink 10 oz of Magnesium Citrate? I'm glad you asked...

    12:05 pm: It's time. You shotgun a 10 oz bottle like it's a lukewarm PBR and you don't want to be a pussy in front of your older brother's friends.

    It's suppose to be grape flavored but it's becoming quite clear that whoever led the R&D team that day has never actually tasted anything grape in their life. You are already regretting this decision.

    12:06 pm: You deep throat a cupcake like you've been saving it for the apocalypse because let's face it...that time is here. It's going to turn to liquid form before it even clears your throat but you don't care. All is right in the world at this moment. Hold on to that. You're about to enter a very dark period in your life.

    12:37 pm: First sign of life. The pressure is growing. You already have 5 lbs of impacted shit in your colon and you basically just drank the "safe for humans" version of Drano. You feel a poop coming on finally. You think it's time. You're wrong. You get a little snake turd as a teaser.

    Take note...this is the last semi-solid thing you will see leaving your body for the next 24 hours.

    12:57 pm: That little science experiment you got cooking is about to reach it's boiling point. Your stomach is angry now. It hates you...you can feel it. You have exactly .3 seconds to make it to the nearest toilet but you can't run... NEVER run! You pray to god there is enough elasticity in your butthole to keep the gates closed 5 more steps as you start to preemptively undo your pants to save valuable time. Almost there. 3...2...1...

    12:58 pm: Sweet Mary, mother of God...is this real life? Your cheeks barely hit the seat and all hell breaks loose. The shit/ water mixture you've just created comes out with such force that it actually sprays the back of the toilet bowl at a 45 degree angle thus deflecting it in every direction but down.

    Is that blood?

    False alarm.

    That's just the remnants of a cherry pie you ate at Thanksgiving...when you were 5. The smell is horrid...the sound is frightening. You try to clench whats left of your asshole to soften the blow but it's not working. The whole house just heard your liquid shit fart as it gurgled out of your ass.

    1:06 pm- 8:30 pm: Everything's a blur. You have shit out everything you have ever eaten since the day you were born, everything your ancestors have ever eaten since the early 1800's, and your asshole now feels like you have a flaming hot Cheeto and the tears of a thousand Jalapeno seeds stuck in it.

    You're now curled up in the bathtub ugly crying because you have to remain within arm's reach of the toilet at all times. You have the poop sweats.

    You meet Jesus.

    8:37 pm: Your family will never be able to unsee the things they've seen in the last 8 hours.

    You're broken.

    Your asshole's broken.

    Your spirit's broken.

    Life as you know it will never be the same. But...tomorrow's a new day. You're going to wake up, throw on the only remaining pair of underwear you have that doesn't have a shit stain on it, and you're going to run up to Target with the last shred of dignity you have left...and buy yourself a new toilet brush. You've earned it.

    -unknown

    Sent from my FDA work phone
    I'll fuck your girlfriend because that's the kinda guy I am.

  8. #368
    Super Moderator
    SUPER MOD
    Montego1's Avatar


    Join Date
    Jul 2014
    Posts
    18,236

    Thanks Thanks Given 
    1,335
    Thanks Thanks Received 
    5,406
    Thanked in
    3,179 Posts
    Rep Points
    2147483647

    Quote Originally Posted by Poirot View Post
    What happens when you drink 10 oz of Magnesium Citrate? I'm glad you asked...

    12:05 pm: It's time. You shotgun a 10 oz bottle like it's a lukewarm PBR and you don't want to be a pussy in front of your older brother's friends.

    It's suppose to be grape flavored but it's becoming quite clear that whoever led the R&D team that day has never actually tasted anything grape in their life. You are already regretting this decision.

    12:06 pm: You deep throat a cupcake like you've been saving it for the apocalypse because let's face it...that time is here. It's going to turn to liquid form before it even clears your throat but you don't care. All is right in the world at this moment. Hold on to that. You're about to enter a very dark period in your life.

    12:37 pm: First sign of life. The pressure is growing. You already have 5 lbs of impacted shit in your colon and you basically just drank the "safe for humans" version of Drano. You feel a poop coming on finally. You think it's time. You're wrong. You get a little snake turd as a teaser.

    Take note...this is the last semi-solid thing you will see leaving your body for the next 24 hours.

    12:57 pm: That little science experiment you got cooking is about to reach it's boiling point. Your stomach is angry now. It hates you...you can feel it. You have exactly .3 seconds to make it to the nearest toilet but you can't run... NEVER run! You pray to god there is enough elasticity in your butthole to keep the gates closed 5 more steps as you start to preemptively undo your pants to save valuable time. Almost there. 3...2...1...

    12:58 pm: Sweet Mary, mother of God...is this real life? Your cheeks barely hit the seat and all hell breaks loose. The shit/ water mixture you've just created comes out with such force that it actually sprays the back of the toilet bowl at a 45 degree angle thus deflecting it in every direction but down.

    Is that blood?

    False alarm.

    That's just the remnants of a cherry pie you ate at Thanksgiving...when you were 5. The smell is horrid...the sound is frightening. You try to clench whats left of your asshole to soften the blow but it's not working. The whole house just heard your liquid shit fart as it gurgled out of your ass.

    1:06 pm- 8:30 pm: Everything's a blur. You have shit out everything you have ever eaten since the day you were born, everything your ancestors have ever eaten since the early 1800's, and your asshole now feels like you have a flaming hot Cheeto and the tears of a thousand Jalapeno seeds stuck in it.

    You're now curled up in the bathtub ugly crying because you have to remain within arm's reach of the toilet at all times. You have the poop sweats.

    You meet Jesus.

    8:37 pm: Your family will never be able to unsee the things they've seen in the last 8 hours.

    You're broken.

    Your asshole's broken.

    Your spirit's broken.

    Life as you know it will never be the same. But...tomorrow's a new day. You're going to wake up, throw on the only remaining pair of underwear you have that doesn't have a shit stain on it, and you're going to run up to Target with the last shred of dignity you have left...and buy yourself a new toilet brush. You've earned it.

    -unknown

    Sent from my FDA work phone
    Lol.

    That's like having colitis basically

  9. #369
    Senior Member
    Milford King's Avatar


    Join Date
    Jan 2018
    Location
    Milky Way
    Posts
    5,086

    Thanks Thanks Given 
    1,774
    Thanks Thanks Received 
    1,946
    Thanked in
    1,309 Posts
    Rep Points
    2147483647

    LMAO!

    Yikes... is that the pregame for colonoscopy?

  10. #370
    IM>ASF
    heckler7's Avatar


    Join Date
    Jun 2012
    Location
    trolling ASF pit
    Posts
    11,875

    Thanks Thanks Given 
    2,638
    Thanks Thanks Received 
    2,321
    Thanked in
    1,455 Posts
    Rep Points
    2147483647

    just after 6 minutes someone turned on the conveyor for a second and they all lose their shit. I would be laughing my ass off right then


  11. #371
    Senior Member
    Milford King's Avatar


    Join Date
    Jan 2018
    Location
    Milky Way
    Posts
    5,086

    Thanks Thanks Given 
    1,774
    Thanks Thanks Received 
    1,946
    Thanked in
    1,309 Posts
    Rep Points
    2147483647

    Quote Originally Posted by heckler7 View Post
    just after 6 minutes someone turned on the conveyor for a second and they all lose their shit. I would be laughing my ass off right then

    haha fucking vegans ... such scrawny pussies .. ida chopped em up...

    i eat little pieces of shit like them for breakfast

  12. #372
    Senior Member
    stinkfingerdelux's Avatar


    Join Date
    Feb 2019
    Posts
    1,237

    Thanks Thanks Given 
    479
    Thanks Thanks Received 
    506
    Thanked in
    310 Posts
    Rep Points
    1542451170

    Lolz

    Sent from my SM-G935V using Tapatalk
    ASF : Anabolic Stink Finger

  13. #373
    Swollen Member
    Poirot's Avatar


    Join Date
    Sep 2014
    Location
    Your mom's house
    Posts
    5,367

    Thanks Thanks Given 
    429
    Thanks Thanks Received 
    700
    Thanked in
    486 Posts
    Rep Points
    2147483647

    Quote Originally Posted by Milford King View Post
    haha fucking vegans ... such scrawny pussies .. ida chopped em up...

    i eat little pieces of shit like them for breakfast
    Breakfast,?

    Those little fagets aren't worthy of eating on a Ritz.

    Sent from my FDA work phone
    I'll fuck your girlfriend because that's the kinda guy I am.

  14. #374
    Senior Member


    Join Date
    Mar 2015
    Posts
    1,492

    Thanks Thanks Given 
    216
    Thanks Thanks Received 
    239
    Thanked in
    156 Posts
    Rep Points
    2147483647

    Quote Originally Posted by Montego1 View Post
    Lol.

    That's like having colitis basically
    Yeah I was about to say....that's a regular day for me.

  15. #375
    Senior Member
    Multislacking's Avatar


    Join Date
    Sep 2015
    Posts
    3,853

    Thanks Thanks Given 
    2,287
    Thanks Thanks Received 
    1,065
    Thanked in
    695 Posts
    Rep Points
    2147483647


Similar Threads

  1. This guy is funny....
    By Progress in forum The Pit
    Replies: 4
    Last Post: 01-30-2015, 11:32 AM
  2. funny
    By Scartissue in forum Muscle Central
    Replies: 5
    Last Post: 11-08-2013, 04:55 AM
  3. Funny
    By breakbones in forum Source Checking & Discussion
    Replies: 8
    Last Post: 09-03-2013, 06:39 PM
  4. Funny Funny Shit!
    By RoidsR4m3 in forum Muscle Central
    Replies: 22
    Last Post: 01-12-2013, 08:06 PM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  
Copyright© 2012-2019 Anabolic Steroid Forums