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you cant help people

heckler7

heckler7

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if a person doesnt hit the bottom and realize they are their own worst enemy you cant help them. I have been somewhat involved in my neighbors life to help her kids by helping her, shes just a huge mess and a real alcoholic, not the average person that has a few drinks and maybe on a holiday gets fucked up. Well she finally did it, she drove drunk and got into a accident right in front of the police department. She is losing custody of her children, what a fucking mess. I cant help but feel terrible for her kids. The wife and I discussed and agreed to keep contact with her young ones, take them fishing and stuff like that. The 9 year old has really been forced to grow up and seems like he understands exactly what is going on. WTF is wrong with people.
 
Addiction is a serious disease bro !!! It's crazy the shit that people have to go thru to understand that there really is a problem . It's not an easy thing to acknowledge and to give up !!!
All u can do is hope they understand what really it is they need to do to get better !!!
 
That's so very sad for the kids and seems like mom should have never considered being a mom at the time.

She is still living solely for her self it sounds like.

Ur a pretty cool dude to even want to be in anyway shape or form be involved.
But in reality those kids need a sane sensible adult figure in their life like u.

Big balls for staying in contact brother my cap is off to u!


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Addiction man. I've worked in the field for years. It's sad and frustrating. The worse part is you can't help them until they have the spiritual awakening and hit bottom (and even then they have to help themselves). You can lead a horse to water but you can't make him drink. This sounds like a bottom. Best wishes you sound like a good man to be helping the children.


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heckler7 said:
if a person doesnt hit the bottom and realize they are their own worst enemy you cant help them. I have been somewhat involved in my neighbors life to help her kids by helping her, shes just a huge mess and a real alcoholic, not the average person that has a few drinks and maybe on a holiday gets fucked up. Well she finally did it, she drove drunk and got into a accident right in front of the police department. She is losing custody of her children, what a fucking mess. I cant help but feel terrible for her kids. The wife and I discussed and agreed to keep contact with her young ones, take them fishing and stuff like that. The 9 year old has really been forced to grow up and seems like he understands exactly what is going on. WTF is wrong with people.
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Bro it's awesome that you looked out for the kids but man you have to be careful. I've dealt with this through numerous people in my life and have had one of them end up putting me in a situation that was hard to get out of. Just help but don't go above and beyond it just sets you up for disaster. I hope she didn't hurt anyone else in her careless decision. Good Luck my brother

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Before the pain supercedes the pleasure, they won't stop

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for some of the folk here the may know already some of the story, this woman is a single mom of 4 her man beat the shit out out of her and her 9 year old son tried to stop it and he got hit too. so she has been involved with court and her baby daddy has a warrent out for his arrest. I posted some other threads about other shit but I try not to get involved with her shit at all I just take her boys fishing and to the beach with my kids. but holy fuck man this is the most stupid shit I ever seen, its super sad to see the kids acting more adult than her. I just hate people sometimes
 
heckler7 said:
for some of the folk here the may know already some of the story, this woman is a single mom of 4 her man beat the shit out out of her and her 9 year old son tried to stop it and he got hit too. so she has been involved with court and her baby daddy has a warrent out for his arrest. I posted some other threads about other shit but I try not to get involved with her shit at all I just take her boys fishing and to the beach with my kids. but holy fuck man this is the most stupid shit I ever seen, its super sad to see the kids acting more adult than her. I just hate people sometimes
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People drink and do drugs for all sorts of reasons. Hers was likely to cope with the mental pain/to forget. Now she's hooked with the disease and likely needs this terrible event to happen to get her sober/clean. Once drugs and alcohol is removed for a long period of time she will start to think clearly. Unfortunately the children are young and this will likely fuck with their future relationships. That's my opinion from what I've worked with. Best bet is to get the mom to rehab for 90 days plus sober living and the kids to therapy asap.

Also, good idea to be a positive male role model for the kids to show them not all older men are abusive as fuck. But don't feel like the weight is all on your shoulders. I'd keep clear boundaries with the kids mom. What you will and will not do or be around for. She will likely still be super manipulative until she gets a long period of sobriety.


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bigbal2943 said:
People drink and do drugs for all sorts of reasons. Hers was likely to cope with the mental pain/to forget. Now she's hooked with the disease and likely needs this terrible event to happen to get her sober/clean. Once drugs and alcohol is removed for a long period of time she will start to think clearly. Unfortunately the children are young and this will likely fuck with their future relationships. That's my opinion from what I've worked with. Best bet is to get the mom to rehab for 90 days plus sober living and the kids to therapy asap.

Also, good idea to be a positive male role model for the kids to show them not all older men are abusive as fuck. But don't feel like the weight is all on your shoulders. I'd keep clear boundaries with the kids mom. What you will and will not do or be around for. She will likely still be super manipulative until she gets a long period of sobriety.


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pretty much everything you said. it does feel like a weight just to know whats going on over there. its just hard to watch.
 
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heckler7 said:
if a person doesnt hit the bottom and realize they are their own worst enemy you cant help them. I have been somewhat involved in my neighbors life to help her kids by helping her, shes just a huge mess and a real alcoholic, not the average person that has a few drinks and maybe on a holiday gets fucked up. Well she finally did it, she drove drunk and got into a accident right in front of the police department. She is losing custody of her children, what a fucking mess. I cant help but feel terrible for her kids. The wife and I discussed and agreed to keep contact with her young ones, take them fishing and stuff like that. The 9 year old has really been forced to grow up and seems like he understands exactly what is going on. WTF is wrong with people.
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My mother has been a raging alcoholic since I was 13. She lost her career and home. Nobody can help her and nobody can convince her to stop. I'm 32 now and it is still the same. People like that need to be left to hit rock bottom like you said. Help with finances and other things only enables them. She was a bikini competitor and Paul Mitchell stage model in the 80's and now at age 57 she looks 74. My dad left after a year of this and married a girl he met at BB comps so that probably did not help. Oh the genetics I could have been blessed with if I would have been their child...makes me want to drink.

I won't come near a bottle now.
 
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Great thought and thread Heck
It's a tough call on ur part
Taking in other kids and making them feel safe and have a family
Props Brotha
Much respect on this
Stay true and help where u can
Sub'd If u need some support
Wish best for kids
And u and wife being supportive
Stick to Guns and stay well
I guess in life we have to help in order to move forward and not be selfish
Great job again
 
heckler7 said:
if a person doesnt hit the bottom and realize they are their own worst enemy you cant help them. I have been somewhat involved in my neighbors life to help her kids by helping her, shes just a huge mess and a real alcoholic, not the average person that has a few drinks and maybe on a holiday gets fucked up. Well she finally did it, she drove drunk and got into a accident right in front of the police department. She is losing custody of her children, what a fucking mess. I cant help but feel terrible for her kids. The wife and I discussed and agreed to keep contact with her young ones, take them fishing and stuff like that. The 9 year old has really been forced to grow up and seems like he understands exactly what is going on. WTF is wrong with people.
Click to expand...
Children of alcoholics seem to have issues their whole lives...sux. hopefully she can detox in jail and get her shit together when she gets out
 
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