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bangaroo's : the bitch you DONT tell your friends about

charles bronson

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Get Shredded!
if you have a penis, testicles..

something like this has happened to you.

let me start this off



springbreak, semi famous beach town i grew up in..


im in a club with a couple friends late as fuck, I've been so wasted i haven't even kicked any hustle on pussy all night and suddenly realize the ball is about to be over..

this tall slinky chic, legs forever, thick curly hair half way down to her ass - tits that just can't be that fucking perfect AND real - she wobbles up on high heels hangs onto the wall to keep from falling down. she is nearly as wasted as i am.

the all father has sent this one to me for slaughter. yesssssss...



talky talk talk, she needs a ride to her hotel, the club is shutting down - i have a better idea..

lets go to my buddies house and get some vitamin cocoa to wake us up first

sooooo.. back at the frat house palace, what we affectionately called " the rape dungeon"


we get inside and th room is lit up by a black light, with a single strand of chrstmas lights


its only a few bumps and an hour later I've got her stripped down -

tiny waist , long legs, fake titties. long curly hair. me likey

vitamin cocoa, I'm all numb and amped out - just pounding away with Dane meat hammer

i really was just trying to beat the guts out of this girl, and she wouldn't quit on me. what a trooper.

maybe an hour , maybe fucking three, i really don't know.. i know i had to stop because I was so dehydrated, i was getting cramps in my calves.


i need some fuckg water.. hit the kitchen, little light on over th sink - hey! here comes princess.


holy fuck she's got such a smoking body... mmmmmm

she walks up in my t shirt, leans over and i look her right in the eye..

and its staring off into space

she's shy..

then i look at the other eye - and its staring right fuckng at me

fucking nooooo waaaaaayyyyy



you know , maybe i banged her eye loose

would like to take credit for that, really really would

but the bitch had the crazy eye where you're always looking at the wrong one - then you look at the other one and its staring right at you - and you have to look away because you feel like you just fucking caught trying to figure out which eye was the dead one..


this is a mild one.

i have a couple that get bad. well, pretty bad.

share fuckers, if you don't have at least one good " i can't believe i butchered that chic" story

- then check your fucking man card on the way out

chucky B
 
if you have a penis, testicles..

something like this has happened to you.

let me start this off



springbreak, semi famous beach town i grew up in..


im in a club with a couple friends late as fuck, I've been so wasted i haven't even kicked any hustle on pussy all night and suddenly realize the ball is about to be over..

this tall slinky chic, legs forever, thick curly hair half way down to her ass - tits that just can't be that fucking perfect AND real - she wobbles up on high heels hangs onto the wall to keep from falling down. she is nearly as wasted as i am.

the all father has sent this one to me for slaughter. yesssssss...



talky talk talk, she needs a ride to her hotel, the club is shutting down - i have a better idea..

lets go to my buddies house and get some vitamin cocoa to wake us up first

sooooo.. back at the frat house palace, what we affectionately called " the rape dungeon"


we get inside and th room is lit up by a black light, with a single strand of chrstmas lights


its only a few bumps and an hour later I've got her stripped down -

tiny waist , long legs, fake titties. long curly hair. me likey

vitamin cocoa, I'm all numb and amped out - just pounding away with Dane meat hammer

i really was just trying to beat the guts out of this girl, and she wouldn't quit on me. what a trooper.

maybe an hour , maybe fucking three, i really don't know.. i know i had to stop because I was so dehydrated, i was getting cramps in my calves.


i need some fuckg water.. hit the kitchen, little light on over th sink - hey! here comes princess.


holy fuck she's got such a smoking body... mmmmmm

she walks up in my t shirt, leans over and i look her right in the eye..

and its staring off into space

she's shy..

then i look at the other eye - and its staring right fuckng at me

fucking nooooo waaaaaayyyyy



you know , maybe i banged her eye loose

would like to take credit for that, really really would

but the bitch had the crazy eye where you're always looking at the wrong one - then you look at the other one and its staring right at you - and you have to look away because you feel like you just fucking caught trying to figure out which eye was the dead one..


this is a mild one.

i have a couple that get bad. well, pretty bad.

share fuckers, if you don't have at least one good " i can't believe i butchered that chic" story

- then check your fucking man card on the way out

chucky B


:clapping: Hilarious post, you fuckin crack me up
 
LOL great story!
 
It can be confusing until you know which eye you are supposed to be looking at. Your bar story was awesome too
 
That is straight gonzo right there.

Res ipsa loquitur.
 
She had a bad head light....I thought for sure she was going to have a cock.......:coffee:
 
Hahaha fuckin repped for the googley eyed story .....
 
She had a bad head light....I thought for sure she was going to have a cock.......:coffee:

That or I was hoping she had somehow shit herself when she came out into the light
 
We call them blackberry picking eyes. One eye on the berries, one eye looking for snakes.
almost exact same story as yours. Around noon at a bike rally- we had a nice RV. Gal in a bikini walks by- "my name is Margret, with 1 I" Too drunk to realize no I's in Margret. she is talking "so hot, would do anything for AC and a cold beer." And she did.... A few times.
That night she comes by with no sunglasses. Was wearing an eye patch, though.
all this was 20+ yrs ago.
 
IML Gear Cream!
I picked up this women's basketball player in a stats class one day. I never really found myself attracted to tall women, mainly because I'm short (5'9). She was easily 6'3, maybe taller, but she was really hot blonde hair blue eyes. Nice tits I found out after the ridiculously tight bra was taken off, incredible ass, amazing and amazingly long legs. She came over we did some drinking and some burning of the ganja, and I had some opium at the time so we hit some of that. I thought I was in love, apparently though she assumed she could make herself at home, so after I completely destroyed her vagina for at least 6 hours I pass out. I guess she didn't, she must have went in the bathroom and removed her makeup.

...I wish she hadn't done that. I've never seen a woman go from so hot to so...not with some damn makeup. She was like a solid 9/10 when I met her, and as I made up an excuse to get rid of her the next morning she was probably a 5/10 and only because she still had a smoking bod. Almost doubled up on the ugly overnight. I would've rode it out but I probably would have needed a step stool to doggie style her she was so tall.
 
my roomate picked up a girl at the club that was quiet and knodded to everything he said, seemed like it was just loud and she was trying to listen, later he has her on base and they are banging and we hear eheheheheh hoehehohehohe ehehehehe. We were thinking did randy bring home a retarded chick or is she that drunk. that morning we found out she was deaf. It was awkward around her cause we all heard her fuck noises and she had no idea
 
We call them blackberry picking eyes. One eye on the berries, one eye looking for snakes.
almost exact same story as yours. Around noon at a bike rally- we had a nice RV. Gal in a bikini walks by- "my name is Margret, with 1 I" Too drunk to realize no I's in Margret. she is talking "so hot, would do anything for AC and a cold beer." And she did.... A few times.
That night she comes by with no sunglasses. Was wearing an eye patch, though.
all this was 20+ yrs ago.

That's a good one.
 
Hahaha, the woman that lives next door has that crazy eye. One eye can be looking you directly in the eye and the other is looking for squirrels. Her four kids have that same crazy eye. The oldest daughter got knocked up by a Mexican she met at McDonalds. Had twins (18 months now) and both of them have the crazy eye.
 
Hahaha, the woman that lives next door has that crazy eye. One eye can be looking you directly in the eye and the other is looking for squirrels. Her four kids have that same crazy eye. The oldest daughter got knocked up by a Mexican she met at McDonalds. Had twins (18 months now) and both of them have the crazy eye.
I find it very hard to believe that each offspring of 3 generations would be affected by strabismus.
Cross eyed people are vary rare over here. :(
 
I find it very hard to believe that each offspring of 3 generations would be affected by strabismus.
Cross eyed people are vary rare over here. :(

Believe it or not its true. I wouldn't have though this possible if I didn't see it every day. Not cross eyed more like a lazy eye. Two daughters and two sons. All the kids are really slow to.
 
:roflmao: Sometimes you just have to ask yourself... Is this really a gift from God OR is there a reason she is still wandering around the bar by herself? But to be honest ...in my single partying days that lazy eye would have not deterred me one bit.. Sober ..eye probably but going full throttle no way. Thats a funny fucking story but really nothing I would be ashamed of telling anyone though..
 
I find it very hard to believe that each offspring of 3 generations would be affected by strabismus.
Cross eyed people are vary rare over here. :(

My wife is/was a vision therapist and has experience working with patients that have an eye turn (that is what I call it).

She has told me it is hereditary.
 
My wife is/was a vision therapist and has experience working with patients that have an eye turn (that is what I call it).

She has told me it is hereditary.
Many thanks for clearing that up.
I only know 2 people with such condition, their parent's aren't affected by it.
 
I was born that way. It was hell growing up with kids making fun of me being cross eyed every day but I learned how to fight at a young age. Two surgeries later and its undetectable. If she has insurance and a few grand she will be good as new most likely.
 
Get Shredded!
I was born that way. It was hell growing up with kids making fun of me being cross eyed every day but I learned how to fight at a young age. Two surgeries later and its undetectable. If she has insurance and a few grand she will be good as new most likely.
Same, but it was operated on when I was 5
 
Same, but it was operated on when I was 5
I had one operation when I was really young but they had to wait for the second one when my skull was more adult sized which meant about age 14. I also had poor eyesight so I had glasses on top of being cross eyed. I cannot remember a single day of elementary school when kids did not torment me. I don't wish that on anyone. It makes you an unstable person in my experience.
 
I had one operation when I was really young but they had to wait for the second one when my skull was more adult sized which meant about age 14. I also had poor eyesight so I had glasses on top of being cross eyed. I cannot remember a single day of elementary school when kids did not torment me. I don't wish that on anyone. It makes you an unstable person in my experience.

Kids can be cruel for sure. Life was hard enough with a little acne let alone something like that. Today its even scarier with the non stop harassment these kids face on the internet. Its unreal some of the things I hear about. I didn't know they could correct the lazy eye. That has to be a life saver for some.
 
Kids can be cruel for sure. Life was hard enough with a little acne let alone something like that. Today its even scarier with the non stop harassment these kids face on the internet. Its unreal some of the things I hear about. I didn't know they could correct the lazy eye. That has to be a life saver for some.
Kids can be merciless. Its why army's put machine guns in an 18 year old's hands. They can take cruelty to a whole other level.

For me they partially cut the dominant eye muscle so it wouldn't pull the eye as much. Not sure about the technology today as that was decades ago.
 
Kids can be merciless. Its why army's put machine guns in an 18 year old's hands. They can take cruelty to a whole other level.

For me they partially cut the dominant eye muscle so it wouldn't pull the eye as much. Not sure about the technology today as that was decades ago.
Yeah, in the '70's they cut 3 of the 6 muscle holding g the eye and sized them equally. When I'm tired the eye floats upward. Not rolled up into my head, but the pupils aren't level anymore.
 
Kids can be merciless. Its why army's put machine guns in an 18 year old's hands. They can take cruelty to a whole other level.

For me they partially cut the dominant eye muscle so it wouldn't pull the eye as much. Not sure about the technology today as that was decades ago.


its the same now...or was ten yrs ago..my second daughter was looked at for it..but her eyes track perfectly straight with glasses on and now that shes older she has contact and you can't tell at all
because the ophthalmologist was a moron he described the surgery in detail in front my then 6 yr old daughter...it would have been cosmetic for her only as she does not have binocular vision so between her being completely freaked by the surgery and it not actually fixing her eyesight..we decided to wait..
Im glad we did..she has no eye strain from it
shes been teased in school (I think all kids are) but interestingly enough not because of her eyes or glasses
 
I was born that way. It was hell growing up with kids making fun of me being cross eyed every day but I learned how to fight at a young age. Two surgeries later and its undetectable. If she has insurance and a few grand she will be good as new most likely.


made me feel better to read that, the part about her having options..

that girl was a fucking ferrari with a busted headlight - other than the flaw that made eye contact awkward - she was fucking gorgeous.

hard as it was on you, i can't imagine how hard it would be for a woman..

speaking of hard, i had a fucking stutter and went to school with my cousin who i grew up with the same age as me..

he had down syndrome

so i would just not talk, id get made fun of when i did.

then when people talked shit to benny - i couldn't really do any verbal sparring. i would just swing on whoever was fucking with him, after a while winning or losing didn't really figure into my thinking.. id pound some kid into the dirt if i could or just take the beating.

after a while i was pretty good at violence, comfortable with it. even the kids that knew they could lick me wouldn't talk shit because they knew they'd have to roll around on the ground with the chubby kid - they knew that talking shit would mean they'd have to fight.

whatever. big part of who i am now, just as I'm sure what you went through is a big part of who you are now as well.

i still carry a lot of anger from it. you wear those scars from the shit that hurts you most where nobody sees them.

they call that shit


"character"





anyway, getting back to funny..


there was a biker dude we were all friends with, was older than us - in his forties when we were still just barley into our twenties

big fat fuck with a beard half way down his belly.

rode an old panhead rigid, and drove a fucking child molester van with air brushed paintings on the sides and back of wolves and native women..

we had been passing this crazy bitch around for a few weeks, she was just nutty.. she had fucked all of us, i didn't judge - still dont

whores.. what would this world be without em? sad place indeed

well, he's around one night and asks me - that girl isn't with one of you boys? 'nah man, she been with all of us - pretty sure if you whip out your pork, shell fall down to her knees and smile up at you while she does it'

'man , just use condom sense - the bitch is kooky , not safe!!!'

he is all like - yeah i got this!!

he finds an excuse to make a run to the liquor store - asks her if she wants to go..

and they ride off in the 'native wolf spirit' child molester van with him blasting something like credence clearwater revival born on the bayou on the radio, already talking to her about his fucking panhead chopper and all his beat fucking tattoos..

willy is going to hurt that girl, yikes..


man they disappeared from like 8 o'clock at night on - now we are on beachside at fucking 4 am after being pushed out of the bar after closing - and i see his fucking van parked by the beach ramp

i bet hes stil in there banging that skank! lets go fuck with him!!!!

beat on the sides of the van , police! open up!


he rolls down the window all groggy, just reeking of booze.. he's so fucking hammered

' wtf man, y'all bunch of assholes!'

its dark as fuck, I'm assigning him - willy, you butcher that chic? beat it up buddy?

he starts bragging "yeah i had her begging me to stop and calling me daddy heh heh heh!!!"

I'm looking at this motherfucker in the dark..

"hey willy, wtf is in your beard man? it looks like its fucking shiny or some shit?"


he flips on the fucking dome light

this fuckig guy had blood from his upper lip all the way down his fucking beard.

like from dried brown bright red wet gooey shit all different colors of blood, ok???

he had gone down south on that nasty bitch, and apparently she had started her fucking period - with him drinking patron and thinking he was in heaven munching on some young thing

i mean we got it pretty quick - i was like PLEASE tell me you didn't munch on that bitch willy! wtf man!!!!

he started gagging, bounced out of the fucking van in his underwear at 4 am and ran right into the ocean an started washing his face

it was traumatic for him

fuck it was funny for us tho man

saw the girl the next day, told her what happened and " so yu got your period now huh?"

''yeah i guess why?"

because you got our buddy wily busted for being the nastiest motherfucker in the whole crew - and THAT is sayingg something

" whatever - i didnt even fuck him.."

:eek:wned:
 
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so this thread slowed down.


shame , couple good ones left to tell - and i KNOW you fuckers are holding out

i fucked a midget, and ( small world) a deaf girl

( i would say "olive oil" and she thought it was "i love you" lip reading. seriously try that shit in a mirror )

was at different times, not like i fucked them in the same room or anything..

im not an animal. gosh

just leave it at that, i don't wanna post


then log on a and find out somebody I'm friends with on here..


yea, is a deaf midget.

whose husband has been saying " olive oil " for the last 25 years.

then I'm stuck being the bad guy


mmmk..
 
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