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Confused... but trying not to hurt feelings

ALxSR

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Get Shredded!
To start I have only been with two partners so I have no idea what would cause this or if it's common, and because I don't want to hurt her feelings I've been holding back from blatantly asking. Anyway when me and my current girlfriend started dating she was extremely tight and remained that way for the first 4 months. It was to the point that it took a lot of lube and a good while to work up to actually being able to penetrate her. Now rolling into 6months she has become very loose, some times it's difficult for me to get enough sensation or friction to actually finish.. I asked her if she still plays with her toys when she's not with me, as an attempt to find a reason. The answer was no and she has actually thrown out the only 2 she had. I'm currently living with her so I can say with certainty they are gone... I'm the one to take the trash out. So I'm pretty confused at this point and like I said do not want to ask out of fear it could hurt her feelings. It makes me concerned because the last girl I had this exp with was sleeping with other guys with in 30mins to an Hour of coming over my place... which made for a noticeable difference.

Maybe a woman or someone with more exp than myself can chime in. I don't have a lot of male friends to ask so I've resorted to the awkward post on the forums : /
 
How often do you nail her? It's very possible you have just broken her in man. Was she a virgin or very inexperienced when you got with her 6 months ago? Either this is the case, or every night when you fall asleep she goes to get hollowed out by this guy:

images.jpg


A mod should move this thread to The Pit...
 
2-3 times a week, max 4. And no virgin here... I'm her 8th partner
 
In all honesty, I think there are a number of things that could contribute to this, and I wouldn't be too worried man. For example, my girl rides horses. This doesn't do good things if you know what I mean. It may be time to open the discussion of different access points with her...
 
Um yea she wont let me go near the back door... I'll just discuss it with her so she understands my issue and maybe she'll understand idk. Like I said was trying to avoid hurting her feelings.
 
Maybe she's just not that turned on? The vagina does swell up and "tighten" when under extreme arousal ..

Well... that or Jamal's been giving your girl the ride of her life
 
There are pelvic exercises she can do to tighten it up a little if its an issue. It wont be like new but you can definitely tell the difference.
 
It going to have the hurt feelings if it really is Jamal I'd clear it up
 
Unless she recently gave birth or she is using a bowling pin as a dildo she is not "loose" because of being fucked. When a female gets very excited they get "wet and ready", it sounds like she is just getting to that point now and does not need the lube. Or, she has an above average sized vagina and you have a below average sized cock.
 
IML Gear Cream!
Unless she recently gave birth or she is using a bowling pin as a dildo she is not "loose" because of being fucked. When a female gets very excited they get "wet and ready", it sounds like she is just getting to that point now and does not need the lube. Or, she has an above average sized vagina and you have a below average sized cock.

this.
the vagina actually lengthens and expands when aroused.

She may be worried to tell you that your cock isn't big enough for her giant vagina...
 
I would'nt say anything,because what u say will most likely hurt her feelings and that will always be on her mind when u have sex with her,,,,
 
I would'nt say anything,because what u say will most likely hurt her feelings and that will always be on her mind when u have sex with her,,,,

I disagree..., if it's an issue for you then you have to bring it up, ...how the proper way of doing that in this situation I'm not sure.... But if the sex ain't good for you eventually you'll lose interest in pleasing her as well and then overtime the whole relationship will go to shit.
If you find someone you can talk openly about anything with then you have someone you can live with and have a good meaningful relearionship alongside.
Communication and honesty ( painful or not ) 2 big keys in a successful relationship.
 
I wouldn't even know how to approach that situation. The only time I ever had that problem was when I was using a condom AND it was insanely wet.
 
My girlfriend had our daughter, we never use lube. And it still feels tight like when I first met her. That's weird bro
 
not only will saying something be bad but it will make her lose all confidence in you... hit it from different angles man... put dem legs together and pound away that should tighten it up for ya
 
Need cawk pics to help you bro.
 
Get Shredded!
Pelvic floor exercises are the way to go. Tell her about kegel exercises. They make sex feel better too when a girl does them. Sell her on the other reasons for kegels and get her doing them.

I don't think there's an issue otherwise, you might just be reading too much into it.


(This is Tommy's area of patrol, so it's his discretion to move to the pit section or not.)
 
If it wasn't this way before and it's not something you or she did then you have a real problem as Vags don't get loose on their own. (Stretching them out is also "usually" permenant, fyi). Keep in mind she could be using things from around the house and not telling you. Women love the sensation of being "stuffed" just like men like "a tight piece" and if she wants more than you're offering she probably isn't going to tell you. If you have reason to suspect that it's not something you have done to stretch it out or that she's not just real wet, you need to talk to her and get it out in the open.

Dath is right, the only way that you're going to be happy or feel secure is if you talk about what's going on. If she isn't running around on you (and she may very well not be) the only way you're going to feel better is if you find out. Just remember it's just as likely that it's something you or she did, the vag isn't a rubber band. The only way to fix that is to get her to look into Ben Wa Balls, Kegels, the Singapore Kiss, etc., Btw, the Singapore Kiss techniques totally rock.

Ask her if things feel different and what she thinks it might be and open up the discussion. Just remember to be tactful, as this would be like her trying to talk to you about having small junk. I didn't see where you mentioned it, has she ever had kids? That plays a big part in it with 90% of women.
 
(This is Tommy's area of patrol, so it's his discretion to move to the pit section or not.)


This is a general discussion forum and as long as this doesn't go south it will stay here. In the pit isn't where sound advise dwells, well maybe. Seeing as there is no Health/Sexual discussion forum and we don't get cock pics, although it may help, we're good.
Bro it sounds like she has become a little more used to having sex with your size. I just consulted with an expert, the wife, she says there is a chance that she has become more comfortable with you and she is more aroused. Is she lubricating with stimulation? Has she lost any libido? Questions only the two of you can answer of course, be tactful and talk about this with her. BTW, why throw away the toys? Her idea or yours? You masturbate so why shouldn't she? TRY some toys WITH her, maybe she would really like it.
I always make the joke, if tires were made from pussy, you'd only have to by one set cause they would never wear out. Honestly bro a little personal insight from her won't hurt, she may be wondering the same thing.
 
This is a general discussion forum and as long as this doesn't go south it will stay here. In the pit isn't where sound advise dwells, well maybe. Seeing as there is no Health/Sexual discussion forum and we don't get cock pics, although it may help, we're good.
Bro it sounds like she has become a little more used to having sex with your size. I just consulted with an expert, the wife, she says there is a chance that she has become more comfortable with you and she is more aroused. Is she lubricating with stimulation? Has she lost any libido? Questions only the two of you can answer of course, be tactful and talk about this with her. BTW, why throw away the toys? Her idea or yours? You masturbate so why shouldn't she? TRY some toys WITH her, maybe she would really like it.
I always make the joke, if tires were made from pussy, you'd only have to by one set cause they would never wear out. Honestly bro a little personal insight from her won't hurt, she may be wondering the same thing.
Tommy should write a sex column.





:winkfinger:
 
To answer a few questions no I'm not lacking in that department. Her libido is higher than mine... she wants to have sex every day but most times the best I can do is every other day. As for arousal yes she gets very wet on her own but still chooses to use the lube, idk. She use to do her kegel exercises regulatory when we first met and it made a noticeable difference. From penetration with no problem to can't even break through without a lot of KY. Maybe she's stopped doing them IDk. The toy idea was hers she only threw out one that was 8' long fatter than a red bull can, I don't mind and regularly play with her with her vibrator and gspot tickler. The toys aren't a major thing she's never owned any that were much bigger than me. And honestly Tommy I don't masturbate she keeps me drained so there is never any desire to.

Thanks for the advice and help guys, I have yet to say anything as we haven't had sex in a week because of a respiratory infection on me and she has been dealing with gull stones. But yea thanks again a lot of great advice here and I'll end up discussing it openly with her as I love being with her and don't want silence to ruin a good relationship.
 
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This is a general discussion forum and as long as this doesn't go south it will stay here. In the pit isn't where sound advise dwells, well maybe. Seeing as there is no Health/Sexual discussion forum and we don't get cock pics, although it may help, we're good.
Bro it sounds like she has become a little more used to having sex with your size. I just consulted with an expert, the wife, she says there is a chance that she has become more comfortable with you and she is more aroused. Is she lubricating with stimulation? Has she lost any libido? Questions only the two of you can answer of course, be tactful and talk about this with her. BTW, why throw away the toys? Her idea or yours? You masturbate so why shouldn't she? TRY some toys WITH her, maybe she would really like it.
I always make the joke, if tires were made from pussy, you'd only have to by one set cause they would never wear out. Honestly bro a little personal insight from her won't hurt, she may be wondering the same thing.

Sound advice right here.
 
^ yea no joke this was all 100% better advice than I was expecting
 
You've got your head on right, brother, and a healthy attitude to it. My last suggestion would be try it without the lube, obviously it does make things feel "looser." Best of luck.
 
From penetration with no problem to can't even break through without a lot of KY.

Many factors affect this, for women the arousal begins in the brain and sometimes it is something small like the scent of you on a pillow after you get out of bed in the morning that gets her primed all day. If she has a very high libido she may take care of things on her own in your absence, my wife tells me she does this, you may just be having a looser sensation on one of those days. Honestly this is GOOD because it means she needs it and she's not going elsewhere.

I don't mind and regularly play with her with her vibrator and gspot tickler.

My wife and I enjoy toys and it's a nice addition that doesn't happen all the time, keep that spontaneous. I would like to suggest one in particular that you both would enjoy at the same time, it's called the WeVibe3, she wears it while you are having intercourse and it stimulates her clit, gspot and you at the same time and it makes her more snug, check it out it's awesome.

And honestly Tommy I don't masturbate she keeps me drained so there is never any desire to.

Try doing it for her, it will drive her nuts as much as when she does it for you.

I'll end up discussing it openly with her as I love being with her and don't want silence to ruin a good relationship.

Above all else this is the best piece of advise period, if you two have something good going on this will make it stronger.

Good luck brother, hope this helps.
 
First of all I'm always down for a new toy so you got me looking at it already :)

As for me and her we kind of discussed it I took the "Have you notice any change in the sex" approach... It went beautifully she let me in on a few more things she would like more often as did I for her. Just mentioned the kegels and after only a day or two it made a world of difference, I could tell she had been doing them. Also took you advice Rainer on skipping the lube, just decided to go down on her for a bit till she was nice and ready to go on her own. Not something I do a lot so she lost it when I did. It almost worked lol but still needed the KY. What I noticed is she goes overboard with the KY so I'll be the one the apply it from now on, I only want just enough as to keep some friction there.

Just sharing the issue has brought us closer and honestly the sex after talking about it was out of this world good. Thanks to all that contributed to this thread and for keeping it a professional tone. You guys seriously help me put the idea she was cheating right in the dirt.

Oh and Tommy as for helping her... I caught her masturbating under the cover while we were watching a movie, was wondering why she kept staring at me so intensely. She didn't know what to do when I left and came back with the vibrator :)
 
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